There Must Be Something More

39 | Meredith's Story

"We'll always be here for you, Charlie," Samuel said, patting my shoulder. 

"It just frustrates me, honestly," I said, leaning back on my locker door. I stared up the ceiling. "Calum and Amanda have been my friends for years. And now, just for one thing that changed me, and they--"

"Do you know why after all the numerous things you've done nothing ever changed, but just one prayer of accepting the truth of Jesus Christ has all things mixed up--because Jesus is the whole truth. And the devil doesn't want you to know that, or keep knowing it. And so he sends calamities and troubles your way to make you grow weary," Meredith said. She looked me hard in the eye, and I've never felt something so real, so convicting, it was as if God Himself was speaking to me through my friend. Maybe He was. I knew He was. "But it says in Galatians chapter six verse nine: And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. Jesus never promised a peaceful journey with Him, but He promises that it will be worth it. And when the Lord promises something, He does not promise nonchalantly, but He promises more than you could ever ask or think. 

"Whatever worldly thing you have now and think you're happy with them. It is not real happiness. Trust me, I've been there--"

I interrupted her for a while, "You have?"

She smiled. "I'll take that as a compliment. But honestly, we are all human. And just because I was raised as a follower of Jesus, that didn't mean I was a real one. Sure, I loved to tell people about Him and His love and goodness for us. But still, I had issues I had to deal. I kept praying and praying, thinking I'd receive the answer soon enough. But I didn't. I had struggles I was not winning against for the whole time. 

"As a kid, I used to love telling people about His love. I loved and did it everywhere I went. That's how I got through to Steven. But as I grew older, especially when I became a teenager, I was falling from it. I was still a believer--when everyone was around. But just like my friends in school, when I was alone, I cursed, watched inappropriate things, and I knew I didn't like it. But I still did it. It was like the passage in Romans chapter seven verses fifteen to twenty: For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.  Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 

"I was different on the outside and on the inside. I would smoke at fourteen behind dumpsters, too"--and then her face beamed again, and we were all thunderstruck--"but then an amazing thing happened!"

"What amazing thing?" Samuel asked.

"Grandpa Chuck came," she grinned at me, then to Samuel. "You know what he first told me when he saw me? He said, 'I see a typical teenager in the straits of Arizona!' And I was baffled. A typical teenager? In that time, I always thought no one was typical. Like, all of us were different in our own way. I've always thought that.

"For weeks he'd keep talking to me about God and Bible verses like my mom did when I was a kid. And I knew I liked it--deep inside me, I liked it. But I still didn't want to hear about it. There was something holding me back. Since Mom and Dad were in Nepal that time of the year, I had found out Grandpa was the one babysitting me. And I hated it. It was like in every little thing he did, he always had to include God in it. He always had to talk about Him.

"Everyday when I came home, he'd be reading a Bible and I'd feel irritated. I always felt condemned. Like, he kept reminding me that I had backslid from my faith and I felt like he was pointing out my flaws. But in all honesty and truth, he was just pointing me to the truth. He was pointing me to who I really was. But I didn't know it at that time.

"And then, one day, on a Friday, just as I went to school, he waited for me by the door. I threw him a look that gave him a hint I wanted nothing to do with him. And that was the very first time I didn't hear him say anything, he just raised my backpack and said, 'Going to school without this?' I rolled my eyes and snatched it from him. I was thankful he didn't take the time to talk to me about God.

"On that day too, I was called to a secluded place by my friends. I was spooked since I didn't know that part of the neighborhood and they had called me in the back of an old abandoned factory--"

"How old were you in this?" Samuel asked.

"Fourteen," Meredith said.

"It's crazy how our generation really gets manipulated by the enemy," Samuel said. I nodded in agreement.

"I'll get back to you on that, but anyway, I parked by a bush behind that factory and saw my friends all wearing ski masks and turtlenecks. They motioned for me to come closer, and I did, in spite of my anxious feeling about the situation. That's when I found out they were planning on spraying graffiti on a private property for revenge. My friend, Mike, said the owner of the property was Mr. Clarkson, our History teacher. And Mr. Clarkson had sent him to the principal's office a few days ago. Mike was pretty ticked off about it and he decided to get revenge. I kept pleading for them not to do it, especially because I was thinking we were going to be caught, but they kept at it, anyway. 

"And I was right. The cops found us and we were forced to flee on that very Friday night. I kept telling Mike I didn't need to run since I didn't spray anything, but he insisted we were in it together. I ran and ran. It was one of the worst nights of my life. I felt like a criminal. I thought of my mom and dad and what they would think of me once I get arrested. I thought of Grandpa Chuck and seeing his disappointed face when I face him in jail.

"And as I ran across numerous streets I couldn't even recall, I wanted to search my bag for my phone, and then I felt something. I took it out and realized it was some kind of pamphlet. I read it and realized it was some kind of invitation to a church called Christian Life Chapel. The address was on there. 

"And then I had a brilliant idea. I thought, 'No cop would ever search a church for criminals!' And I went to the address."