Yoongi shouldn't have slept. He shouldn't have ever slept with his pure and innocent bear laying around helpless to the clutches of a horny bastard.
Yoongi walked slowly to the scene of the crime, horror movie actors would be jealous.
The kitchen looked as plain and not description worthy as ever. There, at the very corner of the room was his innocent, helpless, pure and fucking supposedly clean, straight out of the laundry, stuffed bear. How it still manages to smile was a mystery to all.
He got closer, being cautious and careful in the steps he took. He didn't want to overwhelm the traumatized thing.
"Are you okay?" He asked the motionless cub. It didn't say anything, obviously. Yoongi felt tears well in his eyes.
"I'm so sorry!" Yoongi wailed, unable to stop the tears that continuously flowed down his cheeks. He wrapped his arms around the poor thing and cried into its soft fur, uncaring if he got the bear wet with tears. He gasped and suddenly let go as if he was burned.
"What the actual fuck!" He stared at his hand in horror.
"Please be mayonnaise, I mean you're in a kitchen so maybe you could've just wanted a midnight snack?" Yoongi laughed awkwardly, he didn't know who he was trying to convince but that person would definitely not be impressed. As if to prove a point, Yoongi slowly brought the sticky substance to his mouth and slowly, very very slowly, licked the cum off his stained hands.
"Oh, what the fuck! Okay! Okay! It isn't fucking mayonnaise! That jamless little mochi! I'm going to kill him!" Yoongi dashed to their shared bedroom, knowing the needy mut was still sleeping. Of course, because he was busy practically raping Yoongi's, fucking Yoongi's, bear!
He kicked the door open, okay so maybe not kicked, Jin would kill him if he did, more like he opened it hastily while stomping his feet like a child.
"Jimin! Jimin! Wake the fuck up! Your rapist!" When the harsh name escaped his thoroughly traumatized mouth, Jimin woke up.
"What did you just call me?" He asked groggily, disbelief written all over his face.
"A rapist because that what you are! You stupid, inconsiderate, jamless son of whore!" Yoongi couldn't control the words coming out of his mouth. He didn't mean any of them, well except the rapist part, he meant that. He was just so fucking hurt. Jimin knows what that bear means to him. He should know he's been here for so long now and Yoongi was starting to think they had something special. Not like that though. Just bros.
"What the fuck did you just call me," Jimin growled, slowly standing up and shaking the sleep off, and Yoongi was tempted to back out, God he hated it when the younger got bitey or rough. But he will not show weakness in front of this criminal!
With his resolve strengthen, Yoongi replied, "A rapist! The bear! The bear!" Yoongi kept repeating it like a madman, getting dangerously close to Jimin, invading his personal space, and placing his hands on his shoulders only to shake him like a ragdoll.
"What bear?" Jimin asked once Yoongi finally slowed down.
"My bear, Jimin. The one I told you I loved with all my cold and shriveled up heart!" Yoongi yelled in frustration, what other bear was in the fucking house?!
"Oh, that bear," Jimin's eyes lit up in recognition. Yoongi almost sighed in relief.
"That thing that came out of an ashtray, right?" Yoongi sucked in the breath he just released and almost coughed because of how quickly he did it. He managed to compose himself.
"That's fucking racist!"
"That's what my friends told me!"
"Then tell your friends their racist!"
Jimin yelled indignantly, what the fuck even is this conversation?
"Okay, let me get this bi. You're calling me a rapist because of a bear?"
"No! I mean yes but he's not just a bear, he's my best friend. I have proof of your heinous crimes! I tasted and saw your not mayonnaise!"
"Wait, you tasted my cum?" Jimin grinned cheekily at the new piece of information he could use against the other in the near future.
"No! I tasted your not mayonnaise," Yoongi shook his head in denial. He didn't fucking lick cum, just something really close to it.
"Anywhore, Don't you fucking get anywhere near my bear ever again! Don't even try to hump it at all, you horny asshole!"
"Then, let me hump you instead."
....
skillfully avoids writing smut