| Don't Let Me Be Gone |- Joshler

I Know It's Hard Sometimes

Thank you guys so much for everything, all the comments, all the votes all the reads, just everything.
I owe you guys another update soon, don't worry it'll most likely be up tomorrow.
Things just have been really rough for me lately.
I sang at my schools talent show...
And I feel like such an idiot because of it.
I sang Truce...for the second performance after I was done...I said into the mic "stay alive everybody it's worth it I promise".
That's not why I felt so stupid.
I performed it as Blurryface himself, black neck and hands plus my floral kimono.
Still, not why I felt so stupid.
I...I had my friend record it.
I watched it when I had gotten home...
It wasn't my performance that made me feel so stupid...
It was what everyone said about me.
I couldn't hear things well while I was up on stage. So I didn't even know people where calling me horrible things.

"Whats wrong with her?"

"Ugh! It's her!"

"What a freak, she is such a fucking freak."

"She's a whore, I bet."

"She is useless."

"She is so fucking ugly."

"She should kill herself."

And thanks to those people spewing all that venom I did nothing to deserve, I almost died.
Thanks to everyone who decided it would be nice to make fun of who I was and what I was doing, I almost killed myself.
That's just half of my shitty ass problems rn...
My anxiety is through the roof because I'm so scared to hear more venom being directed at me, I've been crying myself to sleep every night, I haven't been eating, I'm hearing more and more voices in my head, I'm getting migraines more frequently and just to top it all off, my schizophrenia is just getting worse.
It's just hard ya know?
But I promise I'll be okay. Keep an eye out for the next update.
Love you guys.
I'll be fine.
Stay alive |-/