At My Worst ( a Nicholas Matthews story)

Extra stuff

So this is just some random stuff about my book about my favorite singer, Nicholas Matthews; Things like deleted stuff/ things I changed or how I pictured everything. 

First of all. Nick and Lexus were just dating cuz I didn't want to go through all the divorce processes, mostly because I have no idea ho that stuff plays out. The thing I wrote in the description is also part of it, but I meant I could've found a way lol. So guys don't think I don't know my Get Scared facts, cuz trust me I do.

That one time that Nick gets hit by the Nintendo 64 controller was inspired by another Get Scared fanfic.. Shout out to KatlanaCross / Asexual Ghostie with her fanfic Among The Fallen Angels 

Through out the book, I re imagined Lloyd's living room like 4 times. The couch was never facing the same way and I don't know why!! I kinda pictured the house like the house I used to live in, but for some reason there was only room, so Nick got stuck on  the couch for like 4 months, or how ever many months it was.

Originally, Nick was supposed to find one of his fans at the arcade that they went to the day after he got cheated on rather than the hot topic, but I decided that it wasn't realistic for someone to just run into Get Scared at an arcade. Ironically, I ran in to Get Scared at an arcade type place like a month later. Luckiest thing in my life Jesus Christ.

I knew I wanted Jessica in the story, but I didn't realize she lived in Chicago. Which is why she was pretty much homeless for the whole thing. I also wasn't too sure of what she looked like. I mean I did, but I couldn't have a face to imagine. I couldn't tell what color her eyes were.. So if I gave her the wrong eye color.. SOrRy.

When I started making the titles, I thought It'd be easy to make each one a reference to a song, but damn was I wrong. I had dig up random lines from their old songs, make the characters say things to make the title fit. So yes every single title has something to do with Get Scared. ALL OF THEM... PLEASE HELP ME!

I made Lloyd have a gift for Nick before I decided what the gift would be.

At one point, I was gonna bring in Ronnie Radke in to the plot so they could write For You for Jess and my best friend was gonna help me write the dialogue for Ronnie because she was literally obsessed with him. But then she got mad (Triggered) at something he did/said, so I threw away the idea. 

I honestly forgot Nick had chest tattoos for a while.

I never really knew how to bring Adam and Dan into the whole thing which is why they had such small roles. Sorry to all of you who would've wanted more from them. 

I noticed sooo many mistakes in this when my best friend (same one from before) read it aloud to me. Like wtf "the door slammed open." "'Can I tell him or is it too personal?' I nodded." You nodded? For which answer??? DAmMit Nicholas! That's like saying do you want pizza or a burrito? "Yes" You're lucky Lloyd understands you... kisugdkidsdfilwuun  Plus words I skipped or added. 

It was supposed to end waaayy before it did. I'm pretty sure I was planning on ending it when he was gonna drown himself. BUUTTT NOOoOo I thought that It wasn't ending the story right because you wouldn't know what happened with everything. SOOoo I lagged it on for a loong time, writting boring chapters then ended it leaving many unanswered questions. Feel Free to ask me about what happened after if you so desire to.

There would be things that I realized I messed up, like saying Nick wrote Goddamn Liar at 14 rather than 16, and isntead of going back and fixing it, I made a whole another chapter making Nick correct himself... WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME

I don't know what else to say anymore lol.. Thanks for reading this cringe fest lol.. Thanks for all the votes and comments you all left. It means a lot to see people like my books.