He can't remember the last time he was actually able to sleep more than one hour a night . As soon as he closes
his eyes there are these memories.
Pictures of his car crashing into one of those trees along that narrow, bumpy country lane. The fear, the horror
when he recognises he's losing control of his car. The one he got for his eighteens birthday. Not a cheap and small one like all the other students got from their parents. His parents wanted him to be safe while driving to high school every day and bought a brand-new Audi with ESP , anti-lock braking system and much more technical achievement he doesn't bother to remember.
Winters are long and hard, roads are often is covered with snow and ice here in this low mountain range in the middle of Ireland.
But it was only early summer when the unthinkable, the worste happened. When he killed his best friend, his sister he never had .
He keeps tossing and turning , his mind blurry. Not capable to think of anything else than this one incident that finished his life though he hasn't even died. Why couldn't he be the one that died squashed in the front seat of his supposed to be safe care.
He isn't aware how much time he's been crying once again, bawling his eyes out, sobbing in his pillow not noticing its wetness.
It's almost ten days he's pretending to be okay. Promising his dad he wouldn't finish his life. But his dad isn't the one to be easily convinced and took away the key to open the gun cabinet. Every day he's hiding his real feelings, his suffering from his parents not wanting to have them more worrying than necessary. His dad just healing from a major stomach cancer surgery can't deal with his broken son and his mum ..
So lost in worrying about her husband , he doesn't want to add his own problems. He just can't stand his guilty feeling, his rotating thoughts, his worries getting worse with every minute he isn't able to fall asleep. How should he ever face Harry , he took away his beloved sister. How to face Louis after crashing his dream of a life together with her. Their love they have never got the chance to show openly afraid of Louis not sharing the same denomination. Gemma being raised in a strictly catholic family was always supposed to end up with a faithful catholic guy. They have never dared to reveal their true feelings besides to Niall. He who hasn't ever failed in supporting them made their dream burst like a bubble. Niall was supposed to protect her not to fucking kill her. His mind is darkening with every thought of Gemma never getting the possibility to marry or raise children. Something she has been dreaming of since she admitted her deep feelings for Louis six months ago. Niall's whole world painted in black with him unable to find a way out of the race to the bottom. And he's falling faster and faster in the all devouring darkness. Then out of sudden he hears that tiny voice inside demanding to join her. Telling him he's not worth living while she, while Gemma died in that car. Telling him he's a shame for his parents for killing their friends' only daughter. Summing it up to his own black thoughts how he will survive without her by his side.
He slowly gets up from his bed puts on his worn out jeans he finds under his desk and a sweater from the chair. Niall doesn't bother to put on socks and tiptoes to the door of his bedroom trying to open it soundlessly. He gladly makes it down the stairs , finds his mum's keys in her bag, slips in his old boots and sneaks out. Fortunately the windows of the master bedroom look on the backyard and he won't risc waking up his parents by starting his mother's car.
He didn't plan where to drive, isn't aware the direction he's taking almost numb due to the continuously increasing voices inside his head. Niall is to weak to question the possibility of hearing someone's voice in his head .Without having second thoughts he keeps on driving through the night. There's no moon light, no glimmering stars making the night less hostile. He takes that narrow, bumpy and curvy country lane he knows like the back of his hand. When he comes closer to the outskirts of the forest he recognises the faint glim under a tree beside the road . That is when he begins to speed up determined with no doubt what to do and directs his car towards the glim. "You are no longer alone, Gem" is his last thought before everything goes black.Author's note
Those who stumbled over my story thank you for reading the prologue.
I don't want to appear demanding asking for votes and comments but if you'd like to do them it would mean loads.
Feel free to tell me what you like or dislike.Questions:
What do you think about Niall's and Gemma's relationship ?
What do you think will happen next ?
Have you ever been in Ireland ?
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A Second Chance
FanfictionWhere Niall is friend with Gemma ever since his first day in kindergarten. She was the one Niall came to when he found out that he is more attracted to guys and didn't dare to tell his parents. He is the only one who knows that she's secretly dating...