Park Jimin; Sinner

Park Jimin; Flying too close to the sun

Anonymous POV

It's dark now.

•••
Jimins POV

I made my way home, the key to the subways feeling heavy in my pocket. I can't wait to find out who it is, how old they are, what they look like, if they are a boy or girl. I don't care that what they do is super controversial an possibly even illegal, there is no doubt in my mind that this person is awesome. They may not even live in Pass, they could have come from Busan or the other small town to the south of us. Did they go to our school?

So many questions.

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Sneaking into my house was actually not a struggle. My aunt must be at bible study with all the middle aged ladies in this town. I feel like they just gossip instead of 'studying the bible' but whatever, who would chose bible study over gossip anyways?

I got inside and made myself some microwave ramen. After I slurped it up I made my way to the bedroom that was getting messier by the day and flopped on my unmade bed before pulling out my phone. I clicked on one of my many contacts and debated wether to text or call. I decided to his the call button.

"Hello?" Jungkooks voice rang through the other end of the line. I smiled, he sounded a bit haphazard, but he somehow made it adorable.

"Hey it's Jimin" through the line I could hear wet dripping noises, and it was a bit echoey, maybe he was in the church's basement or something.

"Oh um, hi Jimin what's up" he said awkwardly through the line. I sat up and flicked through one of my binders, not actually making any attempt to study or do homework.

"Nothing really, I was just bored and thought you would be good to talk to" I said debating wether or not that sounded like flirting. I mean it kind of was but I just hoped Jungkook was clueless enough to not catch on. "So what have you been up to tonight?" I said trying to keep the conversation from dying which is a lot easier to do when you talk in person. I debated telling him about the subway, but decided against it, I don't know if Seagull wanted that information to be shared and I have to respect that, maybe if I ever meet them I can ask if someday Jungkook could see. But personally I don't think he is ready to see it. All the controversial art and topics might be a lot to take in considering he has been living in such a sheltered shoe box environment he probably known next to nothing about society's problems and political issues, but one day he will come around. And when that day comes I would like to show him the subway.

"Oh you know, the basics. School, confession for a bit... Um, I well, I dropped by the uh mill in the woods and then went home." He stuttered. Something seemed off but I didn't want to question it. Maybe something happened with his dad again. I've begun to see a pattern with those kind of things. When his dad hurts him his self esteem drops to alarmingly low levels and I have made it my responsibility to make sure he keeps it in the green. I can't stand to see him hurting both physically and mentally like that.

"How was confession? Any funny stories?" Me and Jungkook had made it our thing that whenever he manned the confessions booth at the church he would tell me the most outrageous confessions he heard. He was a bit weary to do it at first, because it was all supposed to be confidential, but I have never told a soul about what he has shared with me.

He giggled and I swear I combusted somewhere in my chest.

"There was this one lady, comes to church every Sunday, leads the choir program. And she is a cat lady right? She came in today confessing, and crying mind you, that she had accidentally sat on one of her tabbys named Wesley and killed it." He paused for another giggle, making me smile. "I know I shouldn't find that funny but I can't seem to not laugh" I laughed alongside this time.

[][][]

Jungkook and I chatted until I heard the door downstairs open, signalling the dreaded return of my aunt. Her heels clunked loudly on the stairs as she climbed them. I kept hidden behind my closed door, not really wanting to talk to her. Like at all.

So instead I turned towards my homework and decided that maybe I should get started on it.

The night lasted a long time. I spent nearly all of it tossing and turning in my bed, my mind working at a hundred kilometres per minute. What I felt for Jungkook was odd. Usually if I was into somebody, there would be a tightness in my chest and maybe even the swirl of arousal in my lower stomach. But with him it was different. There was still the chest tightness and arousal, but there was also a fluttering in my stomach, my heart skipping beats, and my legs feeling like jelly.

He seemed to invade my thoughts, to simply walk through the gates of my mind as if he owned it. And to say it was disconcerting was an understatement.

Nothing about this situation was good. I, being and idiot had to fall for the soft, shy, gentle and closed off son of this towns pastor. And it was possibly the stupidest thing I could have done. All it can end with is pain. My rejection, or him getting punished by his dad. And both of those situations would lead to my heart being broken.

I couldn't help thinking that Jungkook was like the sun. Bright, lively, and far away, yet constantly being dimmed, shut out by night. And I was a trapped boy, just wanting to be free, to strap on a pair of wings and fly high, to be near the sun.

But we all know what happens when Icarus strays too close to the sun.

:::

Song Rec

Paradise by Got7