Park Jimin; Sinner

Jeon Jungkook; Rebel

I walked away. Leaving Jimin sat on the floor, shirtless and emotionless. The lack of expression on his face worried me slightly, I had never seen him so disconnected from reality. The change sent unwelcome shivers down my spine. But I couldn't back down now. I knew the consequences and had nearly lost sight of them. My father had told me from a very young age that I couldn't date until I was out of his house. And I'm pretty sure that the consequences for dating (girls) were much tamer than having sex with a guy. And the consequence for dating was the clothes iron so I did not want to see what would have happened if I did it with Jimin.

But god help me I wanted to so bad.

Never in my life had I wanted anything more. And that too disturbed me. Two months ago I would have disowned you if you brought up the possibility of me being gay, but now if anyone mentions it I break out into a cold sweat. Wondering if they would somehow know that I am helplessly attracted to Jimin, the local gay boy. 

In just two months everything's changed, and coming from a small, catholic town, change is something I'm not very used to. I was just hit by change like a truck for the first time and I don't know how to deal with it. I know Jimin could help me, but if I'm being honest he is the one that is changing everything. Fuck, that boy even changed my sexuality.

Leaving the desolate graffiti coloured building behind was one of the hardest things I had ever done. I wanted to go back, to kiss Jimin and tell him that everything was going to be alright. But I don't think I could be around him without bursting into flames. He was a ticking time bomb, and I was dancing on eggshells around him. Sooner or later my dad will see and the bomb will explode, destroying both me and Jimin.

So right now I'm steeping off of the eggshells that I have grown so used to, and trying to get some perspective. To see if there is a path around this. But knowing my dad it's impossible.

I walk along the well used sidewalks and make my way back to my large house just off of main street. My dad wouldn't be home right now and my mom was probably out having some tea with her irritating middle aged friends. So theoretically I should have the house to myself.

I opened to door, tiptoeing into the foyer out of habit and let my shoulders relax once I realized my dad wasn't waiting on the couch with his belt in hand or my mom wasn't stalking around the kitchen brandishing her wooden cooking spoon.

Well, one good thing has come out of this day.

I marched downstairs to my bedroom. My comfort zone. The only person who came down here was me, it's the only place in the house that doesn't have bloody memories attached to it. I flop onto my dark grey bed and pull up my phone. I am immediately greeted by my homes teen which sent a pang of sadness through my chest.

It was a blurry picture tainted blue from the lights of the club we went to in Busan. Jimins arm was casually slung over my shoulders, a grin as bright as the sun on his face. I sighed and threw my phone down and instead picked up the remote to my ps4 and quickly lost myself in a game I had already beat 3 times, but Last of Us will always be my favourite.

()()()

Before I knew it the time had gotten pretty late and I needed food. I rolled off my bed and made my way upstairs. Regretfully I wasn't alone anymore. My mom was in the kitchen making what looked like some kind of casserole.

"Who is this Jimin boy I have been hearing about?" She asked while dumping a jar of Ragu Sauce into her casserole pan.

I froze. What was I supposed to say? Play dumb? Say what I know?

"Oh, um, he is one of my friends" I said my voice sounding devastatingly unconfident. All I could think about was earlier today, his lips ghosting all over my chest, neck, and lips, hands going everywhere his mouth didn't. My face seemed to burn with embarrassment and maybe even shame, I just prayed that my mom didn't notice.

"I heard he is a homosexual Jungkook, are you sure you want to friends with that kind of person?" She said with a slight hint of disgust which made my embarrassment evaporate in the heat of the anger now swirling in my veins.

Jimin was such a nice person, how dare she talk badly about him when not once have they exchanged words. Sure, he likes boys, but that doesn't make him a bad person, doesn't make him any lesser than me are. He was a person and so were we. She is being fucking ridiculous.

"Yeah he's gay, but that doesn't mean he isn't a nice person" I snarled, nicer than you will ever be.

"I don't really support you hanging around with this boy" I laughed, a cold humourless laugh, if only she knew what we had done today, she would be downright mortified. I smiled at the thought.

"Well you know what mom? I don't really care" I said with a smirk a quirk of my eyebrow, leaving her looking astonished. I was so done with her trying to control me. So done with her keeping me under a magnifying glass like an insect. So with that I grabbed an apple and walked out with a smile on my face, tossing the apple up and down as I made my departure. If I went home my dad would beat me, and I wasn't really up for that. I couldn't go and stay with Jimin after what happened today, maybe I could go to the station? Or the mill? I wouldn't make it to the mill before dark.

The station it is.

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Song rec

Ko Ko Bop by EXO
(Does anyone actually check these out?)