Begin Again

Chapter 8

Quick note: don't be afraid to tell me your opinions. I could use the constructive criticism lol.

Also, another thing, when Eva bites her lip or wrings her hands, it's showing how nervous and shy she is. It was just a way for me to show her character to all of you. It's a part of who she is. 

Eva's POV

~2 months later~

Evan and I are really good friends now. We hang out a lot and he's asking me to help him set him up with this girl he likes from his old school. Her name is Lily.

As for Harry and I?

We talk. Occasionally.

But seeing as he's with his new group of friends now, it's not as often as before. I saw the signs when I was first introduced to all of them. I won't go into too much detail but he basically let his new "friends" call me names while he just stood back and silently begged me to go along with it. 

He's really happy with Madison now too. Every time we do talk, it's as if there is never a moment where he's not talking about her. Because I couldn't take it, I stopped texting him as much, I stopped talking to him as much...I just stopped trying with him. 

I guess it didn't really affect him much though, otherwise he wouldn't be laughing with his friends by his lockers right now. 

"Hey Eva," Evan greeted as he slid over beside me, bumping into the lockers with an "omph".

"Hello," I smiled, closing my locker. As I turned to face him, I caught a glance from Harry and looked away immediately.

"Did you finish the history assignment," Evan asked, "I tried but I accidentally fell asleep on my homework...and it turns out... I drool!"

He held up a piece of paper with a decent sized stain on it and I cringed as he smiled and pointed to it, "isn't it cool?"

I rolled my eyes and walked past him, "you're a moron."

He followed behind me and shrugged, "hey at least Lily thinks I'm hot."

I smiled and was about to turn the corner of the hallway when Madison's voice stopped me.

"Hey Eva," she called. I turned around and sighed when I saw Eva, Liam, Niall and Harry walking towards me. I suddenly began to get very nervous and I stepped towards Evan. He was a source of my comfort now that Harry was practically gone. Harry seemed to notice my moving towards him because he furrowed his eyebrows at Evan before he glanced to me.

"Yes?" I asked, timidly, breathing out when Evan placed his hand on my back.

"You look pale," she said, "did you starve yourself last night?"

"Excuse me?"

"You know," she replied, "so you could lose weight and go from a size 11 to a size 2...if that's even possible."

Liam and Niall snickered quietly to each other as Madison smirked. But what really surprised me was seeing Harry fight back a smile too. 

"Harry?" I whispered, causing him to look at me, "are you not going to say anything?"

Madison turned to look at him and she laced their fingers together. He gave her a small smile and looked back at me blankly.

"What's there to say? She's right..you could lose the weight," he responded.I took in a deep breath and nodded, looking at the others before bringing my gaze down to the ground. Tears sprung to my eyes as I stood there with my chin trembling pathetically. Evan wrapped his hand around my wrist and pulled me away from them, not before giving Harry a dark look as he looked him up and down. He turned around and led me down the hall, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as I broke down into his shirt. 

"Sh," he said, "don't waste your tears on people like them. They're not worth it."

"But Harry-"

"I don't care what Harry said," he replied, "whoever he is now, he is definitely not your Harry."

I sniffled and nodded. He was right. My Harry was dead and gone now. And I wanted nothing to do with this one.

~

I skipped dinner. Again. Like I've been doing for the past two months.

I mean, I had like one celery stick and an apple but that's it. I didn't have a big lunch either. But I didn't look too pale..or at least, I think I didn't.

I lay in bed, reading a book when I sighed and placed my book to the side. I sat up and ran a hand through my hair as I thought about Harry and what he had become since ditching me.

I guess he really did leave after all. I chuckled bitterly.

Who was I to expect him to stay? He's Harry Styles. I'm just Eva Whitman. A nobody. 

I looked over at my full body mirror and frowned at what I saw. 

A sad and lonely fourteen year old girl stared back at me in the mirror. Cheeks slowly hollowing and my skin was actually pale. My eyes had bags underneath them and my lips were chapped. I looked like something out of a horror film. I stood up and slowly made my way towards the mirror. I lifted up my shirt and turned to inspect my stomach. 

I had lost a little weight, which made my lips curve in satisfaction. I looked back at myself in the mirror and jolted in surprise when I saw my window open in the reflection. I whirled around with a hand on my chest, releasing a breath of relief when I slowly realized that it was just Harry sneaking into my bedroom. 

"What do you want," I asked, once we made eye contact. He looked me up and down and his eyes softened as he bit his lip. He met my gaze with the most saddest and guiltiest look I had ever seen him conjure up. 

"Please tell me you're not starving yourself to lose weight," he whispered, clenching his fists. I rolled my eyes and slowly made my way towards the bed, getting under the covers as he sat down on the edge of it. 

"What's it to you? It's not like you care anymore," I spat. He closed his eyes and shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Eva," he whispered, "I know that won't fix anything but you have to believe me. I-...I don't know what else to say to get you to believe me. I miss you."

"Well I don't," I tried not to cry when I saw the tears spring to his eyes, "I hate you, Harry Styles. You shut me out, like I said you would. You took all of my fears and insecurities and you brought them to life. What happened to my Harry, hm? What happened to that?"

"He's still here, Eva," he tried, "he's still here. I never left-"

"Bullshit," I retorted, rolling my eyes, feeling the tears now free falling down my cheeks, "if you didn't change you would stand up for me every single time your friends insult me. You'd talk to your girlfriend every time she told me to lose weight. You wouldn't let your best friend feel like she should kill herself just so it would be better than putting up with the crap she deals with in school. But you did. Just so you could be cool."

He hung his head in shame at that. I scoffed and laid down in my bed, closing my eyes tightly as the tears flowed down my face. 

"Go away, Harry," I whimpered, "whatever friendship we had was over. You obviously have your friends, and I have Evan now. I'll be fine. I'm not your Eva anymore so just leave."

I felt him take in a sharp breath and let out a whimper. He sniffled a couple of times before I felt him move closer to me. He lightly brushed a strand of hair from my face and I winced at the lightheaded feeling his skin touching mine gave me. 

"I'll always love you, Eva," he sighed, "I'm sorry I broke us."

And he left without another word.

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I really hate Harry right now too, omg this has never happened before. 

Like I actually wanna bulldoze him right now. 

Fuck.

Anyways....

Vote,

Comment,

Love,

S