Begin Again

Chapter 26

I'm saying this because I feel bad for Harry, but as of now, you have nothing to worry about from Harry's part. He ain't gonna fuck up again. 

This isn't going to be like Arranged To Him lmao, man that story stresses me out. And I wrote it.

Eva's POV

Two Weeks Later

I was at Harry's house at the moment. 

We were laying down in his bed, staring up at the ceiling. We didn't say anything for a while but I suspected he wanted to speak. I sighed before I turned on my side and bit my lip.

I had been wanting to tell him that I wanted to try at a relationship. I had been feeling this way for a while. I had figured out that I could trust him as a friend and now I felt like I could take it that much further. I knew it wouldn't be a problem for him, since he was just waiting for the day that I'd say okay.

And I was going to say it today.

I bit my lip as I poked his shoulder. He turned his head over and locked his green eyes onto my brown ones. I smiled softly and sat up, crossing my legs as I placed my hands in my lap. I felt nervousness seep its way into my veins as I bit my lip and contemplated how I wanted to say this. I ran a stressed hand through my hair and Harry seemed to notice my apprehension because he sat up and tilted his head.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I want to try," I mumbled, looking down at my hands. He moved closer and placed a hand on top of mine.

"Eva, I can't understand you, love," he whispered. I sighed and closed my eyes.

Just do it.

"I want to try," I said. I opened my eyes and looked up at him to find him staring at me with wide eyes. He stuttered a bit before he moved a tad closer.

"Are you sure?" he asked, "I don't want to rush you."

"I want to. It's almost the end of October, and I want to spend this last year with you and Evan," I said. He smiled at me and nodded. 

"So," he whispered, "does this mean you're my girlfriend now?"

I shook my head, "we can date..but I want to wait for a while before we make things official. That means no kissing until I'm ready too. I know it might be a lot to ask for but-"

"No," he interrupted, "it's fine. You even giving me a chance is good enough for me. Thank you, Eva."

"You're welcome," I smiled. He smirked and leaned over to press his lips to my cheek. He held them there as he slowly brought his hands to rest on my waist, and soon enough, he had pulled me into him and began to hug me.

I stiffened immediately, but then softened up a bit when I remembered that this was Harry; the boy who had once hurt me, but now had proved himself to me. I relaxed a bit and placed my arms around his neck and held him to me. He moved his lips off of my cheek and nuzzled his head into my neck. We sat there, locked in each other's embrace before we pulled apart. 

"I'm excited for us," he whispered, brushing a strand of hair away from my face. I smiled and nodded softly as I looked down. I felt a bit uncertain about what I just did. I mean, what was the guarantee that I wouldn't get hurt again?

And not just by him. But by Niall.

I knew that for some reason, Niall didn't like seeing me with Harry. I could only imagine what it would be like if he found out we were now in a relationship...or...some type of a relationship.

"Hey," he whispered, noticing my nervousness, "what's wrong, babe?"

"I'm just," I sighed, shaking my head, "nothing, it's okay."

"You sure?"

I nodded. He pursed his lips and furrowed his eyebrows at me as he continued to observe me for a bit longer. Finally, he nodded his head and reached his hand down to intertwine them with my fingers. I smiled as I watched them play together lazily, clasping and unclasping like they were two puzzle pieces. We used to do this all the time when we were younger; just a way to pass the time and it calmed us down a bit too, if we were nervous.

Which is probably why he was doing it now.

"I know you're probably second guessing this," he murmured, leaning his forehead against mine as I kept my gaze locked on our hands, "but I promise you, Eva. I will never, ever, ever think about hurting you again. And if I do, you can leave me for good and I won't ever bother you again."

"Please don't even say that," I said, "I trust you. Whatever happened between us was in the past, Harry. Yes, I am nervous, but that's because it's mainly my conscience telling me to worry because the only person that I ever let into my life is Evan. I'm not used to having more than one person be so close to me."

He nodded and bit his lip, "I just hope you know that I cherish you very much. And if you ever doubt for one minute, that I don't, then just remember this; you are my Eva. You're the girl that was always there for me when we were kids and most likely will continue to be there for me in the future. I left you for a couple of years and treated you like shit and that was the worst period of my life because I knew you deserve better. Hell, you still deserve better...I guess, I'm just trying to say that I won't ever stop trying to earn your forgiveness, Eva. And even when there comes a day when you have forgiven me, I'll still treat it like I haven't because I don't deserve to be forgiven. I'm trying hard to establish how you've managed to say yes to dating me as we speak."

I chuckled.

"But I will never leave you," he promised, green eyes locked onto my brown ones, "that's my promise. Okay?"

I nodded. He smiled and leaned up to press his lips to my forehead. I closed my eyes as I reveled in the light feeling his touch brought me and he pulled back with a lazy smile on his lips.

"Let's take a nap, hm?" he offered. I nodded and he smiled before he wrapped his arms around me and we laid down on the bed, cuddling into each other like we used to. I bit my lip as I found myself getting lost in my own thoughts. 

I wanted to believe Harry, I really did. But with everything that's happened...I guess I was just scared. 

I mean, don't get me wrong, I do trust him, but there's something in my mind that's telling me I shouldn't put too much hope into this. Like...my conscience...

You know what I mean?

I was just hoping nothing bad would happen.

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I hope you guys liked the chapter! I'm going to bed rn. I'll update again tomorrow if I can. 

What do you think will happen next?

I hope you're all doing well. :) Remember, your race, religion, gender, sexual orientation doesn't define who you are and how people perceive you. You're beautiful to the world in your own way and you should embrace that beauty. We are all one, we are all a team no matter what. I love you.

Love,

S.