I can't see. I didn't know why before.
But I sure as hell do now.
I can't see because I have no bloody eyes.
"What... what happened?" I'm at a loss for words. Where did my eyes go? What the fuck has happened? Why can't I remember?
"You jumped in front of a hollow to save me from it. And it... it..." Enoch struggles to finish the sentence, but I already know how it was going to end without him telling me. And it ripped out my eyes in front of them.
"Why don't I remember that?" I ask him.
"Because once you die, you lose who you are. I had to try and summon back your personality and some of your memory so you would remember us." His voice cracks and I hear Emma's teary sigh in front of me.
"Wait, I'm dead? No I'm not, I'm right here. So what I don't have eyes, I'm not dead." I know I'm not dead. That's absurd, how could I be dead?
"Do you remember what my peculiarity is?" Enoch whispers, as if speaking too loud would break him.
I rack my empty head, thinking of what it could possibly be. I remember Emma's is air, I remember mine is shape shifting and Enoch's is...
"Oh," is all I say. Oh shit. I'm dead. "You brought me back to life?"
"Yes." Enoch sniffles.
"But that means that I am a..." I choke on the word. "Puppet. Something that you can control." I shake my head in disbelief. No. I think. I'm not a puppet. I'm a person. But deep down I know. When I woke up, I was waiting for commands. I was empty-headed. I was completely in his control. I was a puppet. I am a puppet. His puppet. It was only when he asked me to remember my past-self, my live-self, that I was able to remember. To, in a way, be who I was. But deep down, as much as I am currently acting as myself, it is just that. Acting. I am not what I used to be. I don't even remember what I used to be. Deep down, regardless of my ignorance to the fact, I know it's true. And I think Enoch and Emma do too.
"Yeah, Y/N. You are a puppet." Enoch's voice breaks and I hear him sob. I hear Emma trying to consult him, but her voice is shaky and hollow. I reach for him, groping around but my fingers only find air.
I stop trying when I work out I can't reach him, even though he sounds so close.
So close yet so far away.
The old Y/N would have kept searching until she found him. Until she had him wrapped in her arms. But I gave up.
Because I'm now a puppet. I don't have feelings. I just have orders.
My orders ring loud and clear in my head.
"Be yourself as you were before."
I can't be myself, Enoch. Not like this. Not dead. I'm so sorry I have let you down, master.
But I have to follow my orders. I have to try.
"Be yourself as you were before."
My empty head bounces the echoing words round and round my skull until something happens.
A light bulb illuminates in my mind, chasing away the darkness, the emptiness, the despair.
I have an idea.
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I noticed that I haven't really been writing author's notes of late. So I thought I'd do a quick one coz I haven't done it in forever. What do you think Y/N's idea is? You should know, it is your idea, after all!
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
~Tamika
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Hope (Enoch O'Connor x Reader)
FanfictionIs there hope for anything? Is there hope for survival? Is there hope for you? Or are you completely lost to the world? Travelling to Miss Peregrine's loop with your ymbryne Miss Avocet was a struggle. Your loop was raided by wights and hollows...