My Adventure Is A Boy Named Kota.

Chapter 27 - A Drunk Mans Words Are A Sober Mans Thoughts.

The next week went by with little drama. Raven didn't show up to school for the remaining of the week and it felt like everything else fell back into place. Well, almost everything.

Kota had become increasingly more distant and as the days went by, he just got quieter and quieter. At lunch times he stopped participating in conversation and just kinda sat there staring at nothing.

The few times I had asked him if he were okay, he just brushed it off, and whilst he still drove me to and from school, it felt like he wasn't there at all.

It was on the Friday after school, as Kota and I were sitting on his bedroom floor studying, when I had finally had enough of it.

"Kota?" I ask him looking up from my book.

"Mhmm?" He asks not even looking up at me.

"Why have you been acting so distant?" I ask him.

He sighs heavily at this. "Can we just talk about it later Finn?"

"No, Kota I want to talk about it now." I say shutting my book and giving all my focus to him.

"Well I don't want to talk about it now, do I? Can't you just let it go." He says turning a page on his book.

"No, I can't, because last time you acted this way you ignored me for a week." I say looking at him as he turned another page. This bothered me enormously so I reach out and grab it from his hands, closing it and putting it down beside me.

"Seriously? What the fuck is your problem Finn!" He asks angrily standing up.

Finally, some form of emotion.

"You, You are my problem Kota. You and your fricken mood swings! You go from asshole to not in seconds and I'm tired of it." I yell, standing up in front of him.

"Well then, why don't you just fucking leave?" He says.

"No, I'm not leaving Kota, you are my best friend. Just talk to me! Please." I beg him

His jaw hardens at this and his eyes darken to a deep blue shade. "I'm not your fucking friend Finn! I never have been and I never will be, so just get the fuck over it." He yells, exploding.

I pause at this. Looking up at him. "You don't mean tha-"

"I do. Just leave me the fuck alone." He says turning around and facing the back wall.

I almost break down and start crying then and there, but I don't. Instead I take a deep breath, turn around and leave. I close my window and curtains and slide down the wall as I start to cry. At some point I hear his motorbike speed down the road but I don't care. I let it all out.

Even though I try to tell myself that Kota didn't mean what he said, what Nicole said to me that day in the bathroom and all of my other insecurities about our friendship came to the forefront of my mind. And I realise that this might be the end of whatever is happening between Kota and I, and every one of those voices inside my head were correct.

+

Later that night, around 12:00 I was sitting at my desk listening to music and studying as sleep was almost impossible.

I was so mad. Gone were the tears and what replaced them was anger. I was furious that Kota would treat me like this after the months of him being by my side every step of the way. But more than mad, I was scared, terrified that he would keep to his word and stop talking to me. That this, whatever was going on between us was truly over. It scared me to death, because I needed Kota more than I knew and it terrified me knowing that he would never feel the same way.