Life is a mixture of happiness and sadness, good and bad, success and failing, love and hatred, strength and weakness, kindness and cruelness, regret and gratefulness, amazing times and terrible times, stupid decisions and wise decisions, lost and r...
Most of who reads or have heard about this topic will probably expect it to include: - Avoid selfishness which is bad - Be selfless - Don't care or love yourself and forget the others in return. Well, what I am going to write before really starting is: DON'T BE SELFLESS, DONT BE SELFISH, Be SELFLISH It's as you read it SELFLISH, not a spelling mistake at all. To Find out the meaning ( although some of you might have guessed it and now know the meaning) read first the definition of SELFISH, and second the definition of SELFLESS: that are written below:
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is a word that describes the person who love and care for himself/ herself so much, that he/she would really accept and love to have, be, and do anything she/he really love despite how badly or negatively it would affect the others, even if the others were people who really love, and take care of her/him, or who sacrificed so much and made her/him happy, he/she would easily and simply love himself/herself only. That will totally lead that selfish person into being alone, unwelcome for loved between people, and untrustworthy in the end.
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is the exact opposite of selfish; it's the person that love and care for the others more than himself/herself, he/she would like to be,have, and do anything the others love or like despite how negatively or badly it would affect himself/herself, even if he/she got hurt physically or personally for that purpose, even if he/she got in trouble or sacrificed so much in his/her life for them, he/she would establish and make his/her life for the purpose of making others happy more than hisself/herself ( for extra information read the Divergent series books, that has a group of people who are too and so much selfless). That will totally lead them to be invaluable, sad , and unsatisfied in the end.
Now, I will present to you the definition of SELFLISH ( a word I invented, although there are some people who have followed it and follow it now but not under the same word ) SELFLISH : as you noticed it's the combination of SELFISH and SELFLESS, it's to love and care for others and yourself too, because to be honest SELFISHNESS is in everyone even the most selfless people, that's why people struggle and have difficult time being selfless since they are running away from something in them, the thoughts and feelings that pops up in you telling you to do/be/ or have something that will make you glad on the coast of others. those will surely pop up no matter how many times you convinced yourself that your happiness exist in others happiness, am not saying that you must follow those always nor to avoid and ignore them always. We are all human that seek happiness in life, so some of us decided to take care and love themselves,and some decided to take care and love others, all that to seek and find their happiness. However, for me I decided to love both sides, but not in a wrong too selfish way, neither in a too selfless way that makes me chase others happiness, it's in a way that I satisfy and learn to love myself so I can care and love others, to establish time for others and for me too. In the other hand, am not denying that happiness can be found in others, it can and it really genuinely happened for me and others, but in the same time it can exist in making myself glad also. For anyone who's really interested in HOW, here's your answer: * If there's someone that needs your help in something, and if you can help that person then help, but try on not deleting all the things you wanted to do before that person appeared but to delay them ( and not to delay them again of course ) or to delay the help if possible, but if you REALLY couldn't help then ask someone else to, don't feel so bad on yourself because you tried at least. In this case that person gets the help and you do the things you wanted so you would be happy for both since you helped without sacrificing EVERYTHING. * Know that SOMETIMES you really have to save some time for yourself whenever you want to or need to, to not ALWAYS build your time for others and do or be what they want, it's to divide your time properly for both, to make sometime where you love doing things or hobbies you desire and goals you want to achieve but in the a suitable time and place, and other times to share your family's, friends', or relative's happy times and sad times ( don't forget occasions, trips, and visiting). That's How you BALANCE your time in life. * Not just to appreciate others achievements and be there to congratulate them, but also to appreciate what you achieve and do also as much as you do with others, not to go through some party or buy gifts whenever they win or achieve sth and in return when you achieve sth big you don't even reward, congratulate, or even be happy and proud of yourself. Make them all be equal and don't cheat on the balance machine. * Don't ever forget your feelings also, if you don't like being humiliated or embarrassed in front of people then don't let that happen to others too. If you really like to feel special and lucky, then help other feeling that if they really wanted to ( you can't make someone special if they don't believe in theirselves and try first). Don't easily hurt yourself personally to get or do what others want and love, because you have feelings also and if you don't appreciate and value your feelings then you can't do that to others and that's not reason one, reason 1 is because you love yourself that you won't give your feelings away for anything but necessary and really serious situations whether it was for yourself or for who you love. Same thing goes with fear, loneliness, and all feelings. Give your feelings value and don't give them away easily, it's okay to protect them or fight for them but not to be the reason for others real misery or failure. * Celebrate your special dates probably and by that every date in the year that you achieved or reached the goal you wanted, keep those dates in mind for every year to remember. The main date that will be the first date to celebrate is your birthday. People think it's only a day that you get gifts and people wish you the best in, no it's more than that, it's to spend time with yourself, spending fun amazing time with yourself AND your family or friends, doing things alone that makes you happy. * Finally, be yourself; don't act or try to deny your flaws or negative sides in front of others because when you do that, you deny yourself too ; you deny the positive and negative sides of you, instead of that accept yourself, love yourself, remind yourself of all the great cool positive things you have even with all the mistakes and failures you made, don't hate yourself, but help yourself after loving your true you. Be who you really want to be not what others want you to be. So what do you think, is it worth the try to see how really glad and satisfy you get and all the happiness you receive from yourself and others too in balance ???
This is article one of the new chapter " Feelings we must conquer", I would appreciate it if you write down your opinion of "The human's worst enemies " chapter.
