Leonis, 1:1, 2:14 - Roach Hotel - Hot Shot

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The studio audience watched in awe as the mechanical arms lowered from the roof of the clean white R.R.O.A.C.H. Weapons Lab. R.R.O.A.C.H. TWO stood amid the perfect unblemished facade of Repair Bay 02 in stark contrast to its surroundings. The overhead bright lights revealed years of bangs, dents, and dings collected on its armored housing over its many years of active service since it was activated in 1953.

The two overhead mechanized appendages hissed and stuttered as their hydraulic socket wrenches tightened down the bolts on the flamethrowers and fuel tanks. As the arms lifted away, the freshly installed cylindrical weapons sparked, igniting small flames at the tip of each of the two nozzles.

R.R.O.A.C.H. TWO rumbled to life and audience cheered in excitement.

"Test bursts only, R.R.O.A.C.H. TWO," the director said over the intercom.

A pair of red and orange flames briefly sputtered from the ends of the weapons.

"Perfect. Okay, let's get this one back out there...start the voting on the next R.R.O.A.C.H. unit. Is ONE back in service?"

<<*>>

"Alright, it's time to go, Broadway...we have a roach to squash." Parker lifted the kitten from the floor and opened the bag's flap. He paused and held Broadway to his chest for a moment longer than he thought he should.

"Purrrr."

"I hope you understand that I hate doing this to you again. By the way, I really hope you got whatever it was out of your system this time before I put you back in the bag. I nearly used up all my handy wipes cleaning you and the inside of this bag out from the last time...although I can't really blame you. There was a couple times there I thought I would be needing those wipes myself."

"Meow."

Parker exhaled and set the purring Broadway down in the bag.

Quietly descending the stairs from the second level, Parker eased up to the exit door that led out onto the bottom floor of the bank. He peered through the vertical glass window that cut through the center of the door and over toward his target destination...the tellers' stations on his left.

Angling around the door to get a better view of the opposite side of the room, Parker could now see one of the R.R.O.A.C.H.'s standing watch in the open doorway. It was the one with the red eyes, R.R.O.A.C.H. Number ONE, and its head was turned away from him. "I got your number one," Parker said and threw a middle finger up at the machine from behind the safety of the door.

Earlier, as Parker sat observing the machines from the broken window, he noticed when Number One rotated its head toward him from the street, its left 'eye' flickered in and out. The young man had assumed that either the accidental spill the machine took earlier messed up one of its eyes or he must have gotten lucky and hit it when he was shooting at it on the run. "Time to see if my plan is going to work..." Parker began to open the door, but froze as Number One backed out into the street.

"Huh? Where are you going, asshole? Oh, well...no time to wait."

Parker took this unexpected opportunity to run across the floor of the bank without observation, especially the one-eyed electronic kind.

Above the marble counter, Parker had noticed one of the panes of thick bulletproof glass was removed by something even its densely constructed material must have been unable to retard. In the past, this glass would have been used to deter any would-be bank robbers...today he hoped the remaining sheets would slow something else down. Nevertheless, the charred gap that existed in the barricade was just big enough for him to get through and hopefully it offered the time Parker calculated he would need to get ready. He waited for a moment, grabbed his bag, and then leapt over the counter top just as a pair of blue eyes emerged through the open door.

The machine screamed and charged forward as it spotted Parker's heat signature standing on the bank floor in the shadows. Its six legs began clattering over the tile, the tips of each metallic foot digging into the concrete, ejecting chunks of marble into the air with each forceful impact.

Parker could see the azure glow of the electronic bug's eyes reflecting off the surface of the bulletproof glass behind him as the machine slammed into it. He heard one of the panes shatter."Shit...looks like I'm gonna have to work harder at Plan A than I thought." A blast of flame and a rush of hot air roaring down the hallway behind him took Parker by surprise. "Come the hell on! They're dragons, now?"

With the soles of his boots squeaking on the old marble floor, Parker ran until he came upon a rapidly approaching wall cutting at a 90° angle to the left. He dropped and slid like he was coming into home plate as flames shot over his head. With his left hand sliding on the ground and his right gripping his bag, he pushed from the floor and let the momentum and his boots' collision with the wall bring him upright once more just as the stream of fire receded. He raced forward and was now at the open vault door with hopefully just enough time. Just like the counter, Parker had cased out the thing earlier when he was concocting his plan. He found this circular slab of metal was everything a massive bank vault door should be, complete with huge deadbolts, rivets, and a large round spindle wheel...exactly what he needed.

Parker removed his haversack and slid it across the floor out of harm's way. He then ran inside the vault, jumped, and turned mid-air to land on his rear, sliding backwards with his pistol in his hand. His back slammed roughly into the safety deposit boxes at the rear of the vault just as the fiery R.R.O.A.C.H. TWO rammed into the wall outside.

The monster generated another frightening roar and with a turn of its head charged full speed toward Parker. The light from the flamethrowers activating on each side of its frightening face were reflecting from Parker's eyes. The clamoring machine's spinning teeth grew closer and closer.

Parker lifted his pistol and fired just as the R.R.O.A.C.H.'s head entered the vault...once...twice.

The two blue eyes shattered in sequence.

Parker scrambled out of the way just as the monster plowed into the wall of safety deposit boxes in a horrendous, echoing symphony of noise. Flames erupted from the flamethrowers and charred the metal boxes and stainless steel ceiling of the vault.

Ducking beneath the flames spraying erratically in every direction, Parker narrowly avoided colliding with the demonic machine as it thrashed blindly about. He grabbed the vault door and pulled with all of his might to get the thing moving, Parker then made his way around to the outside of the door to push. He shoved and it quickly squealed forward. "Move damn you! C'mon!!!" Parker shouted.

Parker could see the flames bursting through the edge of the closing door. He could hear the din of the killing machine's screaming and clattering. It all diminished with each foot the door moved until it finally closed with a BOOM. Parker spun the spindle and ran for his bag.

Racing out into the street and into the dark city, Parker heard a rumbling coming from the building. Within seconds, the lower part of the New York Loan and Savings building exploded in a brilliant flash of light.

"One down..."

  <<*>> 

Ronald scanned over the silent audience and then at Diane. They both nearly jumped from their skins as the crowd roared in applause.

"Oh shit."

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