Chapter 1

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Beam POV

I run to my class from parking lot as fast as I can. It is 8:09, and I'm late coming to Professor Tony class. I have texted Pha and Kit to tell that I might skip the class if the professor holds a pop quiz. I stand in front of the door and fix my shirt. Damn.. my body is full of sweat right now. I take a peek, and what I see right now is very surprising. Most of my classmates are busy talking. I open the door and suddenly the class becomes quite.

"Shit Beam,. I thought you are professor!" Kit yelled at me. My friends continue talking. I take a seat beside Pha.

"Where is Professor?" I innocently ask.

"I don't know. But the kids said he is probably out of town since yesterday he didn't come to P'Susan class" Pha explains. I only nod. Thanks God. I don't have to absent today.

I take my phone from my pocket. There is one message.

From Forth.

Shit.

Are you busy after class? Let's meet up.

I sigh. I stare at my phone screen. I don't know what to reply. My relationship with Forth seems complicated. After that *ehm* one night stand, I always try to avoid him. My friends, especially Pha and Kit, always ask me what happened between me and Forth. But I can't explain to them yet. Not until I can describe how my feeling is toward him. People might think that I put myself in difficult situation when I myself can choose to forget about what happened that night. No, it isn't that simple, especially that guy keep chasing after me. He always tells me that he wants to take responsibility.

Damn it. I'm not a woman, Forth.

I decide to ignore his message, and talk with my classmates.

It's 12 P.M.

I spot a black motorcycle park in front of my faculty. Forth is wearing black shirt.

It's hot.

No.. not Forth. I mean the weather.

"What are you doing here Forth?" Pha who is walking behind me asks him.

"Oi Pha. I.. mm..... I'm picking Beam up" Forth answer confidently. On the other hand, I stare at Forth. I try to send him signal 'can you please get lost from here? I don't want to talk with you'.

"Really? Where do you want to go? Drink?" Kit looks at me and Forth.

"No. I need to discuss something with Beam. I really want to ask both of you to join us. But since.. errrr I believe that Beam will not permit it, maybe I'll invite you to another party next time"

Kit and Pha just nod their heads. I don't know what to do. I really want to ignore Forth and run to my car. But I believe that It isn't the best solution. Kit and Pha will interrogate me like 'why are you avoiding Forth?" "Did something happen?"

It is impossible to say "Yes. I'm avoiding him. I had sex with him two weeks ago and Forth said he wants to take responsibility. Oh wait. He also said he loves me now."

No.. I can't tell my friend like that.

"it will rain soon. Let's use my car instead. I will wait you in my car," I look at Forth and talk with serious tone, so he can't refuse. "Pha...Kit... I will text you guys about the assignment from Mrs. Julie. Tonight. I promise." I tap Kit shoulder and go to parking lot. I can hear Forth park his motorcycle beside my faculty.

I sit in my car. I'm the one who will drive.

"How are you today Beam?" Forth is smiling at me. He take his seat belt and look at me. "Why didn't you reply my message? Were you busy?"

I keep silent for few seconds, "Yes, I was. And I hope you can understand if I don't reply your message it means that I don't want to talk with you."

Forth stares at me. I can feel his sadness.

"I'm sorry, Beam. Forth doesn't intend to disturb you. But Forth misses Beam, na. "

"What do you want, Forth?"

"Forth wants Beam"

Shit.

I can feel my cheeks getting hot. I know that Forth is always brave to show his feeling, but I never knew how it feels like, until now.. I feel like my heart beats faster.

"If you feel sorry toward me, you don't...."

"NO... I never feel sorry. Not about that night and my feeling toward Beam. I'm thankful that I did it with you, Beam. That night was special to me. And you, now you are the special one for me, right now."

I can't say anything. My head suddenly hurts. I just realized that we are still in my car, in parking lot, in my faculty.

Damn it.

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