I choose You

Chapter 22

Beam POV

As my prediction, this semester is very frustrating. I have a lot of assignments from our lecturers. This situation makes me and my friends get stress easily. We hardly go out, even for simply holding drinking party on weekend. I and Kit even have to stay at Pha's dorm because of some projects. It has been two months with the same daily habits. I feel sorry to myself and my best friends.

We can't have date with our boyfriends. Pha is lucky because N'Wayo is always supportive towards his study, while Ming never gets tired to come to our faculty to see Kit, even though it was only fifteen minutes.

How about Forth?

I seldom meet him these past few weeks. He is also busy with his final tasks. At first, he always came to our building to join lunch. But then, he stops coming after getting busy with his duty. The last time I saw him is ten days ago. I even don't know how he is doing recently. He only texts me in the morning and before sleeping.  We rarely have video call too. I'm not complaining. Honestly, it feels empty. I'm used to seeing Forth every day. It is weird that I can't listen to his voice  as often as before. Yeah.. I miss him.

Actually, my body condition is getting worse. Having many assignment with hectic schedules is both physically and mentally tiring. I have got insomnia since the first week of this semester. Then, I have lost my appetite. I  often skip my breakfast because we have morning class four days a week. As a result, I slowly have bad headache which occur whenever I'm getting stress. Like today, I, Pha and Kit went to campus earlier at 6 AM. We should finish our project before 11 in which make me feel that pain again.

"Finally..... the assignment from Prof. Yu has been completed." Kit sighs.

"Yea.. at least we don't have to stay up at night because of this work." I respond. Yes... it's lunch time. I need to eat something before passing out. To add that I need sugar too.

"Guys... we have three other assignments," Pha ruins our happiness. Can't you let us enjoy this little free time?

"Pha.... please... you ruin my mood," Kit nags.

"Sorry.. sorry.... I don't intend to make you have bad mood. I only want to remind you."

"Alright alright.... why so serious guys? Both of you had better go to your Nong." I'm tired already. I don't want to hear any argument today.

Pha looks at his watch, then as fast as speed of light, he disappears. He must miss N'Yo so bad.

"So... Beam. Do you want to  go to faculty of Engineering? I have appointment with Ming, too. We can go there together," I nod my head. I take my back from the back seat, and walk out from the class with Ai'Kitty.

We go to faculty of Engineering by using Kit's car. I left my car at Pha's dorm. But now, I regret my decision. I didn't have idea that Kit would have date with Ming.

"Where is that guy? He said we should meet here at 12, but it is 12.15 already." Kit starts playing with his phone; afraid that Ming might call and cancel their appointment.

It is not Ming who comes to the cafeteria,  it is Forth and his friends, around 6 people.

"Oiii... Beam!" Sharp shouts from behind. Forth and the others who didn't realize I'm sitting with Kit suddenly look at our table.

Shit... I don't like attention from others, especially in public places like this.

I only wave my hand, and smile. Those engineers-to-be walks towards us and sit on beside our table. Some of them greet me and Kit. We can only say "hi" or "What's up" to them. Yet, I can't greet Forth properly. It is so damn awkward. It is not like we are fighting or what. Yet, Forth is sitting with his friends instead of joining our table. I'm little bit disappointed.

"Are you guys fighting?" Kit whispers in my ear.

"Huh? No........!" I raise my voice little bit. Kit hits my head. He might be embarrassed because some people look at us weirdly, including Forth.

Kit pretends nothing happen. But then he continues, "Why is your boyfriend sitting there? He even didn't greet you with kiss, like he usually does. It's strange,"

I don't reply his question. No comment.

Suddenly my head hurts. God... this pain again.

I have had bad headache since this morning. The pain comes occasionally. But once I feel it, I really want to faint.  Honestly, I hide my condition from my friends and also Forth. I don't want to make them worry. I think it is just a light headache because of stress and lack of sleep.

"Are you okay, Beam?" Kit taps my shoulder gently.

"Yeah.... I'm okay."

"You have looked pale recently. Are you feeling unwell or something?"

The pain is getting worse. I can't answer Kit's question because his voice sounds like a buzz. My best friend keep talking, but I can't hear what he is saying. I even don't notice that Ming has been sitting in front of me until I'm able to open my eyes. It seems like he is talking with me, but I'm not able to answer.

"P'Beam..... are you okay?" Ming shouts.

"Beam......!" Kit taps my hands.

"Don't yell." I say with my low voice.

Thanks to their shouting, Engineering students beside our table look at me worriedly, and ask whether I'm okay or not. I can recognize Sharp's voice but not others.

"I think I..... should go back, Ai'Kit...." I immediately stand up without realizing that my action makes the pain goes worse.

I lose my balance, and it all goes black.

I lost my consciousness.

***

I smell familiar scent. A combination between alcohol and  the iodoform smell. I must be in a clinic or in hospital. I slowly open my eyes, but I see some 'stars' in the ceiling.

It signs bad.

I blink my eyes few times until I hear a voice calling my name. A voice that I have missed these past few weeks. Forth's.

"Are you awake? How is your feeling?" Forth touches my head gently and then holds my hand. I really want to say something, but my voice won't come out.

"It's okay..... I'm here. You should take a rest. Don't force yourself," he kisses my hand.

I don't know how, but suddenly I feel sleepy.

Should I go back to sleep?

What if Forth disappear when I wake up?

to be continued