OUT OF MIND / MYG.

THIRTY NINE

i felt absolutely horrible when i awoke.

a heavy feeling overtook me.

suffocating me.

it was as if there was cotton in my mouth, making it difficult to swallow.

my eyes were dry and irritated from crying.

a headache plagued me and every movement of my head made me whimper in pain.

the world was fuzzy.

dr. choi came in.

he looked different.

"how are you doing, areum?"

my mouth never uttered a response.

i couldn't figure it out.

nothing made sense.

"you're probably still out of it from the tranquilizer. that's okay. we do need to talk about what's been going on."

i just blinked.

empty.

numb.

and i was fine with that.

the pain in my chest was only a dull reminder in contrast to the flaming agony it once had been.

"from what i can tell, areum, you were experiencing a psychotic break."

i didn't react.

i just gazed out into oblivion.

dr. choi continued.

"from your medical history, i know this would have been your second one. the first being when you were twelve years old, resulting in the fire incident."

he just kept talking.

"you started developing schizophrenia when you were younger. it was in your genes. that's were nari came from. you needed a friend to help you cope with the abuse from your father."

"he was the worst."

i whispered out of no where.

my throat was scratchy and everything just hurt.

broken.

but i couldn't be bothered to care.

"you had previously befriended your next door neighbors. do you remember them?"

dr. choi questioned.

and i tried to remember buㅡ

"no!"

"yes, areum."

i shook my head.

this wasn't happening.

"no no no no! you're lying!"