I must have managed to doze off for a while because when Jess nudged me awake I was told we were about five minutes from the farm. I stayed cuddled into Jess’s side as I stared out the window, trying to wake up a bit more. I’ll admit, I did miss the endless countryside. There were only endless fields with the occasional house showing up as we drove down the country road that was so familiar to me. Jess seemed to be caught up in the sights as well as she hadn’t looked away from the window since she woke me up. This place was beautiful in all honesty. It’s just some of the memories weren’t and that’s what held the fear and dread in the back of my mind.
When Caleb turned the truck onto the farm’s driveway, that’s when I finally sat up straight. I could feel my heart rate increasing dramatically and I think Jess sensed my nervousness as she took my hand again before shooting me a reassuring look. To be honest, she looked just as nervous as me.
Caleb took his time driving up the seemingly endless winding driveway and I wasn’t sure if I was thankful for it or if that just made my nerves worse. Seeing the empty fields is what broke my heart the most. Every pasture used to be full and now there was nearly nothing left. When the house finally came into view I heard Jess whisper something under her breath which sounded a lot like ‘holy shit.’ I’ll just say, our house is huge. Much bigger than what we ever needed but for whatever reason my parents always found the need to show off that they were rich. It was never really a concern for me to be honest. It’s just what was normal for us.
“Hey, Caleb, could you just give us a second?” I asked him as he cut the engine off.
“Sure thing. I’ll just take your bags up to your room,” he smiled before getting out.
“Is something wrong?” Jess asked as I turned to her. Seemed like a relatively stupid question but I was actually more concerned about her.
“No, but I wanted to make sure you were still okay with all this. You just seem really nervous. As nervous as I am,” I smiled slightly at the end. To be honest I was trying really hard not to just freak out right now.
“I’m just nervous to meet them. They’re your parents, Elena. Of course I’d be nervous about meeting my girlfriend’s parents,” she said. She was pretty unconvincing though. I knew there was something else.
“What is it really? Be honest because I know that isn’t all.” She should know by now that I could see right through her when she was holding things back. “Remember our talk about being honest and communicating with each other?”
She sighed heavily and dropped her gaze slightly as I reminded her. As much as I hold things back, one thing’s for sure: We both needed to start being more open with each other. I linked both our hands together and attempted to catch her gaze in order to encourage her to tell me. When she did finally look up at me, I could see how reluctant she was but she spoke up anyway.
“It’s just… I can’t help thinking about what you told me a while back, before we even got together,” she said quietly.
“What did I tell you?” I asked, tilting my head slightly in confusion. That seemed like such a long time ago now in my mind.
“You’ll think I’m stupid,” she muttered in an annoyed tone. Most likely annoyed at herself I imagine.
“I promise I won’t think you’re stupid. If it’s bothering you then it’s important, not stupid,” I said truthfully.
“When you told me about your ex. Ashley? How you’d broken up with her after your parents disapproved because you didn’t love her enough. It’s been playing on my mind,” she confessed.
That absolutely was not stupid and to be honest I wish she’d have brought this up sooner. I hated that she was sitting here this whole time comparing herself to my ex. Jess was obviously no comparison but I think if I were in her place I would have the same thoughts.