Twisted {Jacob Black}

Burn Burn Burn

I thought it would never stop.

Maybe I would burn forever, and stay engulfed in the flames that were swarming over every part of my body, so viciously that I felt numb. If someone touched me, I couldn't feel it, but my screams never stopped. It was involuntary, because even I knew that my screams wouldn't make the pain stop, but I needed for them to understand. Whoever was there, I needed them to understand how painful it was. Excruciating.

Pain. And more pain.

After a while - I had no concept of time - the muffled voices around me blocked out completely. After Sam had said I was 'changing', my first reaction was total confusion. Changing into what? It was almost like the pain stopped my brain, or at least slowed it down, but apparently Jacob's brain worked perfectly. He figured it out before me, and before I had almost lost ability to sense anything, I'd heard his reaction, and that broke me.

Jacob's hand had completely left mine, his arms almost falling slack with shock. There was only a few minutes of silence, in which I was entirely impatient. He left me? Why did he leave me? Where had he gone? Throughout these few seconds my painful sobs hadn't stopped, and the burning had seemed to intensify. Why would no one make it stop?

Pain. More pain.

And then suddenly I wasn't the only one screaming, but Jacobs yells weren't the same as mine. "What?! No! She can't be! MAKE IT STOP, SAM!" Well, at least he seemed to understand that I was in pain and wanted it to stop, but.. Why did he sound so horrified? What was happening to me?

And then, almost in a wave of shock, the reality hit me. And suddenly I knew exactly what was happening to me, but I didn't want to believe it.

Pain. More pain.

That's when everything seemed to shut off. I couldn't hear, I couldn't feel, or smell, or see. My sadness and anger only seemed to intensify the pain, if that was possible, and the flames inside my body felt like they would destroy me. I wanted to die, I knew that then.

I was changing into a vampire. I would be a demon, just like them.

How could I, and why would I want to live with myself if I was a monster? I didn't want to hurt people, I didn't want to live like that. They weren't even alive. Why? Why me? What had I ever done?

Pain. More pain.

And whilst I was burning, whilst I was being torn apart from the inside out, it felt like forever, and I came to a different conclusion. Jacob. Jacob would be able to help me.

Jake was my safe place, and I knew in my heart that he would never see me in a way that I saw myself. He would never think of me as a demon, or someone capable of harming people. No, Jake wouldn't. He would help me. No matter how bad it was, he would be there.

I knew then that we could figure it out, just like we always did. I hadn't been through too much in the past weeks to just give up now. Jake fought, and so had I. Now we just had to fight together.

Or at least, that's what I had thought... Until I woke up alone in the forest.

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Can you hear me screaming?! This was so hard to write, the entire time I was telling myself 'no, don't do it that's awful', but if you're reading this then I clearly did it. Sooooooo, enjoy haha.

I know what I'm doing with this, trust me!!

- Author