Spirit's Journey

CHAPTER 30- Spirit: All The Change

"What did you, Hannah and Storm talk about earlier?" His name spat out of my mouth like I hated saying it unexpectedly. Which, in my opinion, he didn't deserve such a name.

"Oh nothing, we just babbled about the prey. Why?" She asked, looking up at me with those large, wondering eyes.

I knew what she was trying to do immediately- Get me to think that me asking made me look like I cared what Storm said.

Which I didn't, so I didn't say anything back to her. The silence dragged on for awhile, and I examined to ground to keep my mind off of things. It was sort of like dried clay- hard and brownish greyish, with cracks in some places and occasional pieces of dried grass that popped up between them. The hard dirt hurt my paws and was strewn all over the place, making me occasionally trip over a stump on mound of the stuff.

"I am here for you, you know." My ears flicked up, but I kept my head down to look over at Midnight with surprised eyes, wondering if I'd heard her correctly.

All I could say was "what?"

And Midnight's pelt twitched on her back as if she felt awkward, but she restarted with a clam, steady voice.

"Anything you need, anything you wish or don't wish to talk about, I am there to help you with it."

Well, that was the first time anyone had said anything like that to me; and I didn't know how to respond but I simply smiled weakly and returned my eyes to the ground.

"Thank you," I murmured, and meant it. Thank the Skycat for Midnight, or who knew where I would be now.

"No problem," said the older kitten.

I wondered briefly how she could be acting so mature at a young age, then remember that I was exactly like her when I was a kit. Too experienced for such a young creature, yet that made me stronger, more aware and understanding of the world I'd been forced to face at such a young age without my mother.

It wasn't fair for the kit; and I felt bad. Kitten's and cubs shouldn't have to be shown pain and suffering at such a young age. They deserved to be free of dangers and struggles until they could grow up and be able to take care of themselves.

But I didn't say any of this to Midnight, because I knew that apologizing for it would have no effect. She'd just say that it was fine, and she'd made the decisions that had brought her here.

"You as well," I said strongly and surely, then looked over at her, into her unusual purple-tinted eyes. Midnight smiled like she meant it.

There were things that I wanted to talk about- so many things, but I was not to type that communicated with others easily. And this was not the time to get broken down and feel so overwhelmed to the point where I all wanted it to stop.

Because we were around the others, and I couldn't determine exactly what they would do if they caught me in such a shape.

All that Hannah, Fallan and Diamond had seen so far was my strong side- The hardheaded, trustworthy, reliable and headstrong Spirit that would always be there to lead and fight and find a way out of things.

But what if one day, I couldn't do that anymore?

I signed and dug my claws into the ground while walking, ripping up paw-fulls of dirt until my paws ached. Well, more than they had, you know.

Everyone was probably looking at me right now, but I didn't care. I wanted something to take my mind off of these horrible thoughts. They were swamping me, so much that I felt like I couldn't breathe.

I wasn't the Skycat- yet I felt as if the weight of the world was on my shoulders, threatening to crush me.

I looked up at the Great Spot. It was smaller than a complete circle tonight, and had just begun rising on the Skycat's back, changing from orange to dark purple.