Spirit's Journey

CHAPTER 66- Spirit: Different Feelings

Me and Storm had slept side by side last night. The thought kept returning to my head, but still I couldn't put my paw on how I should feel about it. Obviously not exited or ecstatic, but if not that, what else? Sometimes when it returned to my mind, I felt warm and content. Other times I just felt embarrassed or numb, like the whole thing had meant nothing.

I gazed over at Hannah and Blaze, talking quietly together with their heads close, lost in conversation. After having at glance at Aspen and Midnight doing the same, some weird feeling stirred in my belly. It seemed like all the tom's and she-cats were mooning over one another, except for me and Storm, and Fallan and Diamond who were of course too young or immature to do such a thing.

What must it be like, to be that close to another cat? I tried to pry the thought into my mind that me and Midnight and my sisters were that close- just not in the same way.

It didn't work. I still knew that even the prospect of a connection like that was missing.

Not that I wanted a connection like that with any of the she-cats... What was I saying? I didn't want a connection like that with anyone! Mooning over some cat like they were the world's best prey, being treated fragile and having a pelt to curl up next to whenever you wanted.

It's rubbish, I thought dejectedly and focused on the ground in front of me instead. At least me and Storm weren't like that- Midnight had expected me to jump into the embrace of another cat at the whisk of a dream's tail, which was pretty accurate.

"It's so nice outside!" Storm said dreamily, jerking me from my thoughts. He'd been walking in my paw-steps for some time now and had finally came up beside me. Thinking about such things only made my ears feel more hot.

I shook out my fur and knew that I should've been thinking about more important matters in the first place- like the fact that a death-path was going to be right in our way on our journey to Cheetah Pride.

Had I ever even crossed one before? I couldn't remember. It must not have been any ones that were hard, black stone trails that smelled of smoke. I'd seen those from a distance and moved over the skinnier, quieter stony-rocked paths but not the ones that were as dangerous.

Despite my thoughts I couldn't help but feel optimistic- it was nice today. A butterfly drifted past every now and then and Diamond enjoyed the sun by rolling around on the grass until one of us called her to keep up. She practiced hunting by using grass stalks and didn't get tangled under any cat's paws.

The warmth of the day seemed to have brought everyone into a sort of dream state... Especially Fallan, who pranced about if she were a deer and played with the tall grasses like a kit. Soon her and Diamond were jumping around like frogs.

Flowers dotted the grass under-paw, in bloom now that the Great Paw was at it's highest peak and had been warming the earth. Soon, though, I knew our paws would be touching rough dry dirt and the pointy stalks shooting in rows from the ground. Either way I remembered how hard the Cold-Paws had been up on the mountains, and relished that the hardships were nearly over.

My eyes landed on Blaze and Hannah again, bubbling with laughter and twining their tails as Diamond demonstrated one of her unique side-flips. Fallan watched from close by, her amber eyes glimmering in the heat. The kitten meowed happily up to them, clearly pleased to have so much attention on her.

I heard Storm move his head back and forth and shuffled a mouse-length away to give him space. He must have realized I was watching my sisters and Hannah's mate and foster-kit. Instead of empty air I felt the whisk of a tail touch my flank, light as a brush of the softest kit-fur.

Watching the tom confusingly, I almost looked away in astonishment as the cat nipped off something small and white from the ground. My heart seemed to plummet as he swiveled around.