Old Fashioned Hood Love

7/ Waking Up Without You

"....I'm a mess right now. Out of order, I'm torn up, I'm going down. Want you hold me together, I'm pouring out. I need you, that's how I feel...."

Keri Hilson | Where Did He Go

Michelle Phat Phat Anderson

I had been surrounded in complete darkness. No dreams. I was very thankful for that. But, I could hear everything going on around me I just couldn't move nor speak. Every time someone comes in to speak with me, I could hear them breaking down begging me to come back or wake up when I've been here all along. I couldn't understand anything going on. I wanted to reach out and tell them I'm here but, I couldn't get the strength to move nor speak. It was as if I was bounded someway.

Slowly the darkness faded away as a bright light began to take over. I shielded my eyes as I tried my best to look at it. It was so strong that I shut my eyes tightly together and seconds later reopened them to see me now standing in an all white room. It was blank and empty. I looked around and began screaming and shouting for someone to help me out.

"Michelle?" I had to be dreaming.

"Michelle?" I was losing my damn mind.

Those two voices belonged to people who were not here with me and I know damn well I'm not dead.

"Phat can you please turn around?" His beautiful voice asked.

Unshed tears clouded my vision as I nodded my head. I slowly turned around and behold in front of me eyes stood my father and brother both wearing all white suits. They looked the same from the last time I saw them and they even had a beautiful glow to them.

"Poppa? Bubba?" I whispered as the tears spilled over.

They nodded their heads and I wasted no time running into their arms pulling them both into my embrace. I sobbed into their arms as they had thier arms wrapped securely around me.

"Am I dead?" I asked once I had calmed down and pulled away.

"No." They said.

"Well, how am I here? Seeing you?" I asked confused.

"You were in a coma but, now honey, it's time for you to wake up." My bubba explained.

Bubba was my older brother named Marcus. He was eight years older than me and he treated me like I was a princess. Him and my father. They used to spoil the hell outta me back when we were home and they were alive. I missed them dearly.

"But, I won't be able to see y'all." I instantly became saddened.

"No, but when the time is right we'll be waiting here for you with open arms. But, your mom and sister needs you. Not too mention that lil' nigga you so in love with needs you as much as you need him." My poppa said.

"You know about Messiah?" Just as his name rolled off my tounge I couldn't contain the large cheesy grin that made its' way onto my face just at the mere mention of him.

"We can see all. We're watching over y'all. I want you to take him to visit your Uncle Pepay and his wife, Nicole. You all will need some advice on your, uh,"

"Relationship." My Bubba filled in since my poppa had trouble saying the word.

I giggled and nodded my head.

"I love you Poppa and Bubba. I miss you so much and will be waiting for my return. Bye-bye." I went to kiss them on their cheeks as I stepped away.