Anything [David Dobrik] REWRITTEN

27. let me talk

sunday, december 3, 2017

i moved the last box into my new house and set it onto the counter in the kitchen. my life had gone down hill since the last time i was in LA

the hate had slowed down a lot and i hadn't posted on social media at all. i got a new phone and lost all of my contacts so i cant call anyone. anthony was finally in jail and jc was no longer in my life. i havent seen david in a few weeks and its been insane. i started seeing a therapist who helped me figure shit out. she convinced me to move back to LA and i was excited to see everyone again. i wasn't sure if they were going to let me back in or not but i just wanted to say hi and apologize. i finally bought a house of my own and i was ready to be myself again.

i downloaded all of my social media apps and logged in to see what i've missed. i lurked on everyone's social media a bit, taking longer on davids and admiring his beautiful smile. i sighed in content and unpacked everything in my house. i moved around furniture and built a few things to make the house more homey. i had everything ready and was happy with my place. i was finally home. i just needed david.

i quickly got ready and drove of to the guys house that just so happened to be a few blocks away from mine.

i knocked on the door my heart racing and beating out of  my chest, afraid of everyones reaction. the door opened and i was met with jason's face. he immediately embraced me into a tight hug and i was pleased to hug him back.

"jason." i smiled and pulled away a bit.

"ellie. oh my god you're back. everyone's been worried sick, davids been a mess. we tried tracking you down but we couldn't find you. oh my god, everyone's going to be so happy. come in, come in." he ushered me inside.

"is david here?" i asked and fidgeted with my fingers.

"no, but he'll be here soon." jason smiled.

"jason who's at the- ellie." scotty grinned and pulled me into a hug. "we thought you died."

"i'm not dead scott." i chuckled.

"i can see that." he laughed. "david has been... a mess."

"i... heard." i sighed and looked down and my fingers again.

"i'm glad you're back." he smiled again and set his arm on my shoulder.

"i'm glad to be back." i smiled.

"david should be here any moment." jason interrupted and i smiled.

"i want to apologize to everyone for leaving out of no where." i frowned.

"we understand." jason nodded. "we can invite everyone over later tonight." jason suggested.

"are you sure?" i asked.

"of course."

"thank you jason."

"jason! who's car is that parked outside?"david yelled when he closed the door. he turned around to face jason and i, meeting my eyes where they locked in on each other.

"david." i was the first to say something. i couldn't tell what his emotion was. happy? sad? confused? angry?

"el." he said is disbelief.

"you look good." i blurted, not sure what to say.

"'you look good'?" he repeated. "you leave me just to come back weeks later and the first thing you say to me is 'you look good'?" he said angrily.

"i-"

"how about 'hey david sorry i left you out of no where. sorry i didn't call or text. sorry i left all social media ever. sorry i left you heart broken?" he asked with rage.

"david let the girl explain." jason interjected.

"i told you i love you and you left me." he said.

"da-"

"i needed you by my side and you just left."

"please-"

"you just packed your shit right in front of me and didn't even care about how i felt."

"i can-"

"not even a text."

"let me talk!" i raised my voice a bit and jason slowly left the living room with scotty.

"no!" he raised his voice back. "you don't deserve to explain yourself!"

"i couldnt hurt you more than i already have!" i yelled as tears formed in my eyes.

"leaving me hurt me!" his eyes watered.

"i didn't think it would." i shook my head. "i thought that you didn't need me, that i was making your life shit." i said and tried to stay calm.

"of course i need you!" he yelled. "el i love you! i haven't been able to sleep, eat, or think!"

"that was the problem!" i exclaimed.

"you shouldn't have to need me to be stable, you shouldn't have to live your life by whether or not im with you." i said. "i need you to be strong without me."

"so you decided to leave?" he looked at me with a questioning look.

"i left because i needed to get my shit straight." i said. "i need to find myself again and decide on what i needed to do for myself, i need to cope with everything i've been through."

"what do you mean?" he asked in confusion.

"david i almost killed myself." i said as a tear streamed down my face.

"what?" he asked im disbelief.

"i couldn't... because i knew it would kill you... and i couldn't cause you anymore pain." i cried. "so i went to a mental hospital... i stayed there for everyday those weeks that i was gone. i saw the therapist every day and she helped me find myself." i plopped onto the couch.

"el-" david sighed.

"i was checked out on friday... moved into a house a few blocks away and got everything settled." i smiled. "im better now."

"el-" he said and sat next to me on the red couch.

"i'm sorry for everything, as much as i didn't want to leave you, i had to. i had to find myself, and you had to learn to be without me." i gave him a small smiled and gripped onto his hand.

"i'm so sorry." he frowned.

"don't be, none of this is your fault. this is all me, i hurt us both, and i am so unbelievably sorry for having it go down the way it did." i said and i places my hand in his cheek.

"i love you." he said as he cried.

"and i love you." i smiled through the tears and gave him a soft kiss on the lips before pulling away.

"i'm sorry i left." i cried.

"me too." he cried with me.

"i missed you." i smiled through the tears.

"just don't ever leave me again."

"anything for you."

"and everything for you."

•••

BITCH WHAT THE FUCK

im happy

this whole book is trash but like it's cute and messy and dramatic i hope y'all like it

so dellie is back and it's gonna be lit for a while

im hype

are y'all hype?

i hope so

anywayysss

thats it for todays chapter thanks for reading this @user30647123
dont forget to vote and comment anything else to add yall?