My Two Best Friends|G.D|E.D

51|"she's gone"

| Ethan |

"I fucking told you we should've stopped before it reached this point! I told you so!" I screamed slamming our front door that we just entered.

"She would've found out sooner or later, whether or not we stopped," Grayson mumbled stomping upstairs.

"This is your fucking fault!" I chased him up the stairs in a rush, "She's gone because of you!"

Grayson quickly jerked his body backwards now facing me, "Don't you dare fucking put our shit on me!"

"I was the one to suggest we stop the shit!" I shouted.

"Stop it Ethan, I mean it," Grayson threatened me under his breath and stomped into his room.

Grayson attempted to slam his door in my face, but I shoved my foot in front of me to stop that from happening. 

"You fucked this up for us Gray!" I yelled.

Grayson's back faced me, but I already knew there was an obnoxious amount of anger plastered on his face, "Ethan... quit it."

"No! You just want me to quit it because you can't handle the fact that you're the reason why-"

Out of nowhere, Grayson rotated his body around to face me and charged at me like a bull. He extended his arms fully out and used them to push my shoulders, resulting in me getting thrown backwards and hitting the door behind me.

"Ow," I groaned from pain as I lied on his wooden floor, rubbing my bumped head.

"She's gone Ethan! Beth fucking left us! I get it! But, it's not because of me! This is just my fault as it is yours! Don't take your anger on the fact that she left us because of us, on me!" Grayson barked.

I think Grayson pushing me and causing me to bump my head, hit me with realization.

I'm taking out all my anger and frustration on  Grayson because I have no one else to blame it on, when I should really blame myself. 

Grayson and I both fucked up, but we fucked up, out of love. But, she'll never understand that.

I love her so much that I did all this for her.

I sniffled, "How are we going to get her back?"

"We can't," Grayson mumbled and layed himself on his bed.

I shook my head, "Don't say that."

"She'll never take us back," Gryason muttered.

"She can't hate us..." I whimpered in denial.

"She hates us... we love her. I guess that's just how it's going to be from now on," Grayson sighed.

"C-can we do anything? Anything? Apologize? Pay them back? Get Seth a new dog?" I blabbered out ideas, eager to find a solution.

Grayson rolled over on the bed, no longer facing me, "There's nothing we can do. She's gone."

"So, you're just giving up?" I scoffed rising to my towering height.

"We should've given up 7 years ago," Grayson whispered.

My eyebrow furrowed, "What are you saying?"

"I don't know," Grayson mumbled.

"Are we supposed to just wait for her to come back to us?" I asked.

Grayson slightly shrugged his shoulders as he lied on his side not facing me.

Harshly, I bit my lip to the point I could feel pain and I snapped.

My fist made aggresive contact with Grayson's wall beside me, resulting in a large hole I just created.

"Fuck," I groaned under my breath massaging my newly sore knuckles.

My eyes quickly glanced up towards Grayson. I had high expectations that he would become furious with me for destroying the wall in his room, but he had no reaction whatsoever.

Me punching the wall in his room, is me displaying the anger we both have, but Grayson isn't showing anything.

All he's doing is soaking in his anger, frustration, and sadness, but I can't do that. 

It's so hard to keep that all in and just lay down, not doing anything. I can barely control my own self right now. The only temptation I have is to completely lash out and misbehave to portray my feelings.

Except, no amount of action is strong enough to even accurately present the horrible ache in my heart.

I lost her and it's because she discovered the truth, and the truth is that I'm a monster.

There's nothing I can no longer do to have Beth understand my point of view.

Out of love, it was all out of love, but she'll never see it as that.

Powerful emotions of jealousy, loneliness, and love took over us and that's what caused us to do all those horrible things.

I'm literally in so much shock. Thank you guys so much for 13,000 reads and for making this story #884 ranked in fanfiction! Thank you so much