Love does cause pain

Finally awake.

♦️ Harley's p.o.v ♦️

Placing my hands on either side of my stomach resulted in a strong kicks to both hands. The smile that spread across my face was neither too big nor small, not fake and purely genuine. I could think about the future, without my smile faltering, because I know I have Pam and Selina neither of them hate me. When we get out of this place I'm never leaving again. Yes I've thought that before but now I know, no matter what the Gotham city sirens will always be together.

We can be a family. Me, Pam, the twins, Kitty and hopefully Phoebe aswell. Thinking of family I wonder what my Ma would think of all this... I mean if I'm not causing trouble she won't complain. I wonder if Pam will hang up her suit with me.

Could I ask her to do that for me? Would she do that for me?
Would Selina?

The flurry of kicks inside of my stomach brought me back to reality, and of course I remembered about the spring against my back ready to rip through the mattress. Rotating my body around and off the spring was a terrible idea. My body was comfortable but now the twins weren't, they rotated restlessly kicking and squirming. My palms rubbed against my face, waking myself up or just preparing to be up all night, knowing the twins won't get comfortable again for a long time. Stretching my arms out past my head I grabbed the squishy toy in my hands.

Pulling my arms back and pressing the Poison Ivy plush to my chest I realised how old it was. Once bright and colourful polyester, was now covered in a layer of fluff and dirt. Selina bought me this not long before one of my first stays in Arkham, could she have known then... was I the only one that couldn't see her feelings, what a great psychiatrist I was. The doll worked just as great as the first time, it soothed me and apparently the twins too.

Taking a deep breath I smiled, that was easier than I thought it would be. My eyes fluttered shut and a smile took over my face. Slowly dragging my fingers on soft fabric. Thinking of Red always helped me fall asleep, it stopped my mind from wandering and over thinking everything I've ever done.

I just think about her holding me. Whispering to me... telling me she loves me over and over again. Till my eyes. Flutter shut.

⏩

My instantly forgotten dream merged with reality as my body woke up, fingers tracing around my jaw and down my neck. A quiet hum vibrated in my throat. Instead of opening my eyes I snaked my arms on to her l-

My breath got stuck, goosebumps took over my skin. That wasn't Arkham fabric, it was stiff tailored and my head couldn't handle the painful memories that came with it. My fingers twitched around the the stitching. Swallowing hard there was only one way out of this, he's in my cell, there's no escape.

"Puddin?" A shaky smile was placed tightly onto my face as my eyes opened taking in the light, what little of it there was.

I saw the stripes of blood on his right sleeve, trying to convince myself it was a guards was useless, I know he has dirt on most of the guards here... it's an inmate's, someone who would stand in his way.

"How's my babyy?" His finger found my chin and tugged till our eyes met.

Could everyone be wrong? He sounds genuine, his eyes focused on me. His grip on me was soft gentle almost.

"I'm feeling better no-" The support underneath my chin vanished, my face tingled before strong no longer gentle hands dug into my jaw.

Pulling my face towards his all I could see was the fury that had taken over his entire body, his brows violently pointing at the bridge of his nose. I watched as those thin lips tugged up into a snarl.

"Why Do YOU think I care about how YOU are doing?! My baby Harely how is MY BOY?!"

My hands where trembling uncontrollably, my mouth opening and closing repeatedly unable to catch the right words, I can't slip up. Resting one of my hands on his twi- baby, I bowed my head.

"H-he missed his Pa." The bright light sparkling in his eyes could easily of been mistaken for joy, but I'd finally realised that's not what it is, that's the look he gets when he's plotting... plotting to keep the control he has over my baby.

"Whell yes o'course get up you need ta change..."

Everything else he said was silenced out in my head. I couldn't hear him. I couldn't hear my own replies. I simply slipped away into the back of my mind. My body obediently followed behind him. I didn't flinch as he undressed me. My arms felt numb as I pulled a diffrent fabric over my body. The only time I let myself take control, was as I slipped the outdated phone out of my jumpsuit and into my back pocket.

Colours. Smells. Noises. They all passed though nothing bringing me back from this place I'd found inside myself. Walking through doors. Passing people. It all meant absolutely nothing to me.

Until I felt fur against my ankle. My eyes reconnected with the world around me. This wasn't his usual choice for a based of operations, it had a sense of warmth. Instead of greys and cold metals there where dashes of greens, reds, purples and yellows... paintings? Doors made from wood and not metals. Was this a real house? With 2 puppies?!

"No more of those dog cat failures, these boys will listen to me. Won't you Snicker and Cackle."

Swallowing hard I tried not to think about Bud and Lou, but maybe if I didn't feed them so much or maybe trained them better they would still be here.

"You will not feed them or I will feed you too them." Looking down at the two white haired puppies I felt guilt seep through my skin as I nodded, he will forget to feed them he always does.

Thanks so much for reading I really hope you enjoyed. I guess im back? 😅Comments are always awesome, see you in the next one however long that takes. Love ya's~ Jw

P.s Thanks for sticking with me and this fanfic. All the comments have been awesome 💜