I'm Not Okay (I Promise)

You're Never Gonna Fit In Much, Kid

Gerard's POV:

When I got to school, Mrs. Rivera came to me and gave me the most horrible news.

"You're gonna fail P.E. if you keep going like this." She said.

Fail P.E.? I couldn't fail P.E.! okay, I was failing most of my classes, but I refused to fail P.E.. Even though I missed all the classes.

"You better go to ALL the classes now, you hear me?"

I stared at her, deep in her eyes. All I had to do was a little threat. I know your dirty little secret. I shook my head. No, I wasn't going to threat a teacher.

I sighed.

"Fine."

I was actually kinda ready to run and do whatever you had to do on P.E. that day... Until Mrs. Rivera screamed "GET ON YOUR SWIMSUITES!". And I froze.

I hate swimming. I hate swimsuits. That wasn't worth it.

I started thinking and then I remembered something. And smiled.

So there I was, wearing the school uniform while everyone else was swimming. I was looking around and watching everybody jump and swim.

"Way!" Mrs. Rivera screamed. "Get in the pool right now! You really wanna fail this class?"

"You said I had to be here. You didn't say I had to swim." I smiled.

She narrowed her eyes.

"Don't be the funny one right now, Way. We're talking about your grades. C'mon, get in the pool."

"I can run, if you want. But I'm not entering the pool."

"Today's class is swimming. Thus, you are swimming."

I sighed. I really didn't want to do that.

"Okay. Maybe if I talk to Mr. Franklin... On the janitor's closet... He'll let me miss the class."

She widened her eyes. Then, looked around, as if making sure no one was listening. She thought for a while and, finally, sighed.

"Fine. Stay here. But you better at least attend the classes or I'll have no choice besides fail you."

I smiled.

"Fine by me."

She left, a bit nervous. I smiled, victorious.

I spent the rest of the class just sitting by the pool, watching everybody swim while I did nothing. People seemed to don't see me. But I couldn't care less.

When the class was ending, I decided to leave the pool. I was walking away when, suddenly, I felt someone pushing me. I lost my balance and fell, right into the pool.

I sank. I only felt the water all over my body. I didn't see or hear anything. When I felt my feet hit the pool's floor, I thrashed and swam up.

I took a deep breath when my head was finally out of the water. After opening my eyes, all I saw was Blake, laughing and leaving.

Obviously. It was too good to be true.

I left the pool, soaking wet, and walked to the changing room. All the boys from the swimming class were there, changing. Guess it was worst for me. At least their clothes were dry.

I got a towel and started trying to dry myself. It was kinda useless to try to dry my clothes, but I did it anyway. My long black hair dripped, stuck to my face

I spent a while there, just drying myself and looking around, thinking about nothing and everything at the same time.

Suddenly, right in front of me, I saw two Jocks. One was Jason. The other one was a guy I didn't know much, Oliver, I guess. They both were wearing towels, talking, laughing, and about to change.

Oliver turned around, took off the towel and started getting dressed. I thought Jason would do the same, but... He just stood there. Staring. At Oliver's butt.

He stared for a while, end finally turned around to get dressed, too.

I frowned.

When they were both dressed, they said goodbye and Oliver left. Jason stood there, watching him leave. He looked so... In love.

Finally, Jason left the trance and realized I was staring at him. He immediately changed his expression. Looked shock. He blushed and walked towards me.

I stood up.

"Jason..." I tried to say, but he grabbed me by the collar and pushed me against the lockers. He was trying so hard to look scary, threatening. But I could see in his eyes how nervous and scared he was.

"Way" his voice was trembling a bit. "I don't know what you think you saw, but I swear, if you start spreading lies about me, I swear, I'll..."

"Jason." I interrupted. My voice was calm and low. "Honestly, I don't care if you're gay. There's nothing wrong with that."

For a moment, he lost all his tough composure and looked scared. Vulnerable. But then, he got back and pushed me even harder against the lockers.

"I swear, if you tell anyone..." he was threatening me, but in his eyes, I could see him begging.

He let me go and left the changing room.

Discovering a Jock's secret was one of the best things to happen. I could have my revenge and use that against him. But... In that case, I didn't want to.

It's not like it was a dirty secret, like being addicted to drugs or having an affair. It's just part of who he is, but didn't want to admit.

And honestly, I felt bad for him. Probably he was afraid of telling his friends and not being accepted. Considering how the other Jocks are, I don't know if they would. I decided to leave that problem up to Jason and only Jason.