I'm Not Okay (I Promise)

Do It Now And Do It Loud

Gerard's POV:

Finally, the week was over. The Jocks kept bullying us, but every time I exchanged a look with Jason, he looked scared, like I was just going to burst out his secret at any moment. His anxiety was a better revenger then just telling everyone his secret.

Friday afternoon, the four of us were at my garage. We had finally rehearsed enough and felt ready to record our tape.

"Ready?" asked Mikey. We all nodded. He took a deep breath and put the tape to record.

And the music started.

Well if you wanted honesty
That's all you had to say
I never want to let you down or have you go
It's better off this way

For all the dirty looks
For photographs your boyfriend took
Remember when you broke your foot
from jumping out the second floor?

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out

I was so pumped, singing with all of my soul. Walking and jumping around, the garage was my own stage.

What will it take to show you that it's not the life it seems?
I told you time and time again you sing the words
But don't know what they means

To be a joke and look
Another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time
Take a good hard look

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
You wear me out

Guitar solo. Ray kneed and started shaking his head – and his fro – back and forth. It was amazing seeing how excited all of us were.

Forget about the dirty looks
For photographs your boyfriend took
You said you read me like a book
But the pages are all torn and frayed

The slow part. It was cool to sing like I was whispering and then just scream.

I'm okay

I'm okay

I'm okay, now

"But you really need to listen to me!" I said, or screamed, whatever. "Because I'm telling you the truth! I mean this! I'm okay!"

"Trust me" Frank said, and gave me a kiss on the cheek before going back to detonating on the guitar.

I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, I'm not okay
I'm not o-fucking-kay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay

And we were done. We looked at each other, smiling. That was the best rehearsal we had made yet.

"Ok." Mikey got the tape. "It's done."

We all got closer to take a look.

"Look's like we just birth it. Our child." Frank said. Ray nudged him, laughing.

"When are we going to do it?" he asked.

"On Friday. It's the day where the principal goes around the school to check if everything's fine. We'll have more time to do it. Not that much, though. That's why we'll need distractions."

We nodded.

"And we need a name." I said. I got the tape and a sharpie I found on the table and wrote I'm Not Okay on it.

The three of them smiled.

"Three cheers for sweet revenge!" Frank screamed.

"Yeah!" we screamed back and cheered for us and our plan.