Do you ever feel like if you just DID something a whole situation would have been avoided? It's awful knowing you can't go back but if you just DID something it all could have been avoided. For example, me being stupid I let someone slip away from me because of some reasons that could have been easily avoided and they know who they are (if you're reading this (I doubt) but if you are, hi.) It's so annoying that you know that it can't change yet it's ok? Is it?
It showed me something and opened up my eyes. And weronika you're an angel for helping me get through it. I love you so much ❤. Now I know it was for the better but some annoying af voice in the back of my head is saying "Is it really better? "Think long and hard.
Then there's the time you regret it so much that you hate it. But now it's so much better. Yes I want to run back with ever single inch of my body but something in me and Weronika are like NO so I can't. But if only I would have done something, yet if it didn't I wouldn't be where I am now and I wouldn't have found someone like I did, but it's just something that's killing me so much every day but now I can go a say or two without thinking about someone but it's getting better, when I think about them I don't feel sad or depressed, I smile and think about something else. Smiling... I'm crazy right? Yeah I know it's weird I smile but I just can't help but smile at the memories we shared. The nervousness I felt before talking to them or the butterflies and the late night calls. Yes I miss them but oh well. They feel different so... Can't do nothing. But it's sad. Very sad.
~ I know this is turning into more my feelings but I really like it because it feels like I can vent to myself without anyone knowing but all of you guys read so..... Yeah and I have people I can vent to but idk~
