Okay I'm just going to start with this. Everybody gets angry but for me when I get angry I show it but I also tend to hold it in. It’s not like I want to hold it in I just do. I really want to let it out so people know how I feel and what not to do again. Sometimes I’ll get playful mad where raise my voice but not that much and I’ll try so hard not to smile or laugh but I do and then it’ll be all over. But when I’m really mad, I’ll keep my distance, I’ll stay quiet and I’ll try my best to get everyone to believe nothing is wrong with me because I don’t want to be bothered by anyone. I need to calm down before I do something I might regret or take my anger out on someone that doesn’t even deserve it. That’s because they don’t deserve it. Yes there would be times where someone can simply talk to me and I’ll have a decent conversation with them without going off at any giving point. There have been times where I’ve gotten so mad I punch a wall and put a hole in it because I didn’t want to hurt anybody. Yeah I get mad but I still care about a person’s well-being. I wouldn’t want for them to get hurt especially if it was because of me. I care too much about people to try and hurt them purposely. Even accidently. I mean there be times where I want to hit somebody because of the stuff they do but I would never start something with them. I don’t like conflict. I don’t like altercations. I don’t like drama. I like to be neutral and if somebody is having trouble with somebody else then I will give my advice and that’s. I’ll never put myself in a situation that doesn’t involve me. Especially if it’s over something dumb. Because only then would I really start acting up. But I try to focus on the positives. Like did I offer peace today? Did I resolve any problems between my friends? Did I bring a smile to someone's face? Did I say words of healing? Did I let go of my anger and resentment? Did I allow my anger to affect me? Did I forgive? Did I love? These are the real questions. I must trust that the little bit of love that I show now will bear many fruits, here in this world and the life to come. I really do try to be like the mediator in arguments or fights but sometimes I just be wanting to rip peoples’ heads off, you know? It’s just the common thing to think when it’s just people constantly nagging at each other like cats and dogs. I will admit, I have been in confrontations that have caused me much pain and a lost of a friend but that’s most likely their fault because I never cause anything for somebody to be mad at me. Yeah I may be irritating sometimes but man that don’t mean you gotta start something with somebody to prove your point. Those things could be so irritating. Like could you please handle your situations in a sensible manner thank you. There be times where people will act so childish like act your age. People have enough to deal with nowadays, they don’t need your crap too. People won't have time for you if you are always angry or complaining. Like that will get to a point where they will just start ignoring you all the time and then you won’t have anybody to nag to. If you start stuff then you better know how to end it because if you don’t then you are going to end up ticking off the wrong person and they just might hurt your feelings or even your body. If it were to ever lead to that. You will not be punished for your anger, but you will be punished by your anger. So that means that someone will have the same rage as you and you will end up getting very hurt. Please also note that when a person doesn’t respond back to you it most likely means they don’t want to deal with you or that they don’t like you. So there’s a thought that can cross your mind every now and then. But you also have to remember every day we have plenty of opportunities to get angry, stressed or offended. But what you're doing when you indulge these negative emotions is giving something outside yourself power over your happiness. You can choose to not let little things upset you. It’s not the fact that people say stuff or do things or something happens, it’s just the fact that you let it and allow it to affect you more than what it needs to do in the first place. You can have it happen and move on. Or you can simply act out in a manner that isn’t even nowhere near necessary. For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind. It’s just that simple.
