His Hired BedWarmer (Enticed Series 1)

HHBW-33

Chapter Thirty-Three
Sempiternal of Pain

Reys

Nang makapasok ako rito sa café ay parang nag-alinlangan akong tumuloy. I saw Rowin near the windows while drinking his coffee. Pinatawag kasi ako nito para sa kaso ko, he told me he had something important to tell me.

Lumapit ako kay Rohan matapos kong huminga nang malalim. Pansin ko ang ngiting bungad niya sa akin. Parang pilit na hindi ko maipaliwanag. Nang makaupo ako ay lumandas kaagad ang tingin ko sa isang folder sa mesa kung saan nakapatong ang kamay niya.

"I solved your case this time..."

Hindi ko alam kung anong mararamdaman ko, pero I felt relived but I couldn't be happy entirely. I haven't seen what's inside the folder.

Iniurong ni Rowin ang folder sa akin. Tinignan ko lang siya at tinanguan niya ako.

Pagbukas ko ng folder ay may ilang papel ang naka-attach pero naagaw ng atensyon ko ang larawang naka-ipit ro'n.

"T-This is..." my lips trembled as I held the picture.

It triggered me to take a look at the other papers. May isang larawan ng babae rin ako'ng nakita. It was Rohan's ex-girlfriend and the first picture I saw was Rohan's...

"Why is Rohan here?" kasabay ng pagtanong ko kay Rowin ay ang pagtulo ng mga luha kong hindi ko man lang namalayang namuo sa mga mata ko.

"I was with Rohan the night you were raped. He tried to set me up. But he was caught in his own plan. He was influenced with drugs when he raped you. Nalaman iyon ni Mia and so she threatened Emil. She covered up for what my brother did. It was only this time that he figured out that you're the girl he accidentally rape."

Sinarado ko ang folder at napakuyom ang mga palad kong nakapatong ro'n. Hindi ko alam ang pakiramdam ng masaksak, pero parang mas malala ang nararamdaman ko ngayon kaysa ro'n.

Because I'd rather be stabbed than to feel this pain in my heart.

"Handang panagutan ng kapatid ko ang ginawa niya..."

Napatayo ako at hindi sinagot si Rowin. Akmang maglalakad na sana ako pero biglang nanghina ang mga tuhod ko at nangalumbaba ako sa sahig. Napatayo agad si Rowin at inalalayan akong tumayo. Mabuti na lang at wala masyadong tao sa café kundi ay pagtitinginan na ako.

Iniwan ko si Rowin ro'n at tumakbo palabas ng café kahit nararamdaman kong nanginginig pa rin ang mga paa ko.

My heart is like being squeezed tightly that is making me hard to breathe. Halos hindi ko na marinig ang ingay ng paligid at nabibingi ako ng sarili kong isip.

The voice was similar to Rowin's, ang tabas ng mukha ay kapareho ni Rowin. Bakit hindi ko nga ba kailan man naisip na maaring si Rohan nga iyon?

They don't look the same but they are similar in many ways.

It was Rohan...

The fear I felt ten years ago when I was raped suddenly came rushing to me.

***

Bata pa lang ako itinuro na noon sa akin na patuloy na umiikot ang mundo. Hindi ko inakalang darating ako sa puntong mapapaisip akong tumigil nang tuluyan ang mundo ko.

The past few days have been nothing but me, refusing to move forward. Kung hindi lang ako nahihiya kay Tin ay hindi ako lalabas ng kuwarto ko ngayong araw. It's the 5th day I have been locking myself. I didn't answer my phone calls and never talked to any body. Nagpapasalamat ako kay Tin dahil kahit papaano ay binigyan niya ang ng katahimikan nitong mga nakaraang araw.

I know I shouldn't be weak in times like this because it is my chance to fight for what I should have done ten years ago.

Pero papaano ko ba haharapin ang taong sumira ng buhay ko noon na siya ring bumuo ulit sa akin ngayon?

I am still wrestling with my heart on how to accept everything. If it was just another man, I wouldn't be like this.

Napakarami kong tanong. I wanted to hear at least answers from him but I am too coward to face him. I am afraid that upon facing him, the fear inside me would prevail...and I would eventually forget the good times I had with him...especially that love that my heart carries for him.

And I didn't know that love could hurt so bad...

Nagtungo ako sa kitchen at nagsalin ng tubig sa kettle. Kumuha ako ng mug at ng 3 in 1 coffee. Nabulabog ako bigla nang may bumukas sa pintuan. Mula rito sa kitchen ay tanaw ang living room kaya namataan ko kaagad kung sino ang pumasok.

"Rowin," tawag ko sa kanya at nilapitan siya.

"Help me...please," hinawakan niya ang dalawang kamay ko at napansin ko ang kanyang mukha na para bang hindi mapakali.

"He's going to confess everything...I-I can't just do nothing, Reys...alam kong ikaw ang na-agrabyado rito, pero pakiusap..."

"Sorry, Rowin..." bumitaw ako sa pagkakahawak ko sa kanya.

"No, I should be the one saying that," napayuko siya.

And just like that, Rowin walked out of this room. I clenched my fists and bit my lips. Then the tears started to fall again, probably they won't stop for a while.

***