Change; An Edwin Honoret Fanfiction

1

I'm currently scrolling through the new comments on my Instagram post, and as always, it's just a list of degrading terms that I'm called on the daily. This time the backlash of my caption made it ten times worse then it would've been on the average day.

'Love and lust are the same thing, really' was the caption that I gave the post.

If I'm being brutally honest, I think that 'love' is an emotion that was made up, mainly to make us feel less lonely. We are a social species after all, and feeling like there is someone special out there waiting for us gives us a purpose.

Sure, maybe I don't like love because all that's ever come from previous relationships of mine are harsh words, pain and sex. But if that's love, then the novels are complete bullshit. I used to think I hated the idea of it because I've never felt loved, but that contradicts everything I now believe.

Can't feel something when it's not real.

And don't get me started on romance movies, making it out to be some unrealistic fucking fairytale when in reality you fall for someone and most likely they don't catch you.

"Abigail for gods sake pay attention!" My best friend Hanna raises her voice at me, something that only happens every blue moon.

"Oh lord, forgive me! Forgive me for not being interested in how attractive Nick looks in today. I don't even know what prettymuch is let only care how attractive they are" I ramble, knowing it shuts her up.

"I was talking about work funnily enough but hey, fuck you too" she mumbles. She tries to act hurt but gives up, knowing she can't be serious for two seconds. We both burst out laughing.

"What do you mean? If I have to talk to them, I'm throwing myself out a window. You know that right?"

Honestly, it's not that bad if I have to talk about them, but the idea of Hanna talking to them fills me with fear. I'm scared even think about how Hanna would act around Nick, he is her celebrity crush after all.

"He liked one of your posts didn't he" I'd sigh every time she walked in the room after she posts something on Instagram, she's the most loyal stan despite the fact she has her own.

"It's so obvious though, he thought it was attractive" she'd always smile so wide her cheeks were going to fall off.

"He has a girlfriend, who is pretty fucking gorgeous Han. I love you, and you're stunning, but I'm pretty sure he liked it because he liked the photo, not because he likes you" I would remind her every single fucking time, earning the middle finger and a slam of my now fragile door.

Right now however, she's smiling brighter then any time Nick liked her posts. I didn't think that would be possible without her physically hurting herself, but I'm proved wrong.

"Simon Cowell himself has organised a party for us and them to meet! I'm dying Abigail, I'm dead! See you in hell"

Party's were always my least favourite part of the fame, I hate going out and pretending I prefer dancing over Netflix which I definitely do not. Especially living in Los Angeles with my four best friends, when they go out it's weird for me not to so I'm always dragged along constantly and L.A party's are crazy.

It's so weird thinking that I'm here now when just last year I was in high school, just getting a shitty job at Kmart.

It's even weirder to think that Simon Cowell himself found our separate channels on YouTube where we did covers, and thought that we were talented enough to be apart of a girlband.

"Hanna I haven't even heard one of their songs, I don't want to go" I whined, knowing it's the most annoying thing I can possibly do.

"Laura, Venus, Riley and I already agreed"

"But I-"

"On your behalf" she continued.

I roll my eyes "I hate you, you know that? You always pull shit like this and it gets on my nerves"

"Just go upstairs and get into a dress or something I don't know just make it neat, the dress code is smart casual"

I walk upstairs, actually, I stomp up the stairs while groaning not wanting to have to glam myself up or wear a dress, I'd much prefer to wear some shorts and a tank top matched with some converses and go ride my skateboard but nope, my life is just one big game of Simon says and if you do something he doesn't like, you're out.

I count each step every time I walk up and honestly it's really trippy, sometimes there are 17 stairs and sometimes there are 18, either way that is 17 or 18 stairs too many. Couldn't they just expanded the house outwards? Stairs are pointless really.

I walk into my room slightly taken back due to the fact I completely forgot I switched it up, I decorated it mainly white with little gold pieces scattered around and I'd be lying if I said it didn't look good.

I go over to my walk in wardrobe and rummage through it making a huge mess in an attempt to trying to find something slightly formal, although mess is kind of what I'm known for. Messy house, messy life you know?

I'm put out of my state of misery when I finally find the one dress that I currently own, it's a black skater dress that is slightly meshed in places.

If Hanna thinks I'm dressing in a formally she clearly only has one brain cell, I'd throw myself out a window before that happened.

I hear my phone ding five times before I finally become pissed off with it.

"Shut up" I yell loudly as I walk over to it, the echoes of my anger filling the room.

Brandon Arreaga has followed you!

Austin Porter has followed you!

Zion Kuwonu has followed you!

Edwin Honoret has followed you!

Nick Mara has followed you!

Guess they just found out about the horrors that we're all going to face tonight too.

Merely seconds after putting my phone down and sighing, it dings again with the same tune.

Prettymuch has followed you!

"I get it, okay? I heard the first ding, bitchass"