Hope and Faith

FORTY-THREE: FAITH

It was Thursday afternoon. The week hadn't turned out as bad as it had begun. Faith found ways to occupy herself; thinking of new drawings to sketch, going for walks, swimming in the lake, exploring the town, and of course, seeing Hope.

But there was still the looming problem at hand: her mother and her dating life. Faith hadn't spoken to her mother since Monday night after she broke the news. Each day was the same. Claudia attempted to make contact, and Faith shut her out. But it had been four days. Faith knew she couldn't keep this up forever. So that evening, when her mother knocked on her door, speaking in that low, delicate voice, Faith caved and told her to come in.

It was quiet for a very long time. Claudia stood at the door, staring at Faith; Faith staring back.
"I'm so sorry," her mother said. "I can't apologize enough. I told him that we can't see each other anymore."
"What? Seriously?"
Claudia nodded. "I know now how wrong that was of me. And I didn't know how greatly it would affect you. And Michael, for that matter. And so I just want to apologize, and let you know how sorry I truly am. I never meant to hurt you. And I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me."
Faith stared at her mother, unsure of what to say, how to proceed. She opened her mouth, "I'm sorry, too," she found herself saying. Hope's words were ringing in the back of her mind. She deserves to be happy. "I overreacted. I was being an immature bitch."
"No, you weren't."
"I was," Faith said. "I guess we were both in the wrong."
"I'm sorry I put you in that position. It was unfair to you."
"Okay," Faith said. "And I'm sorry that I got so angry. I guess it just upset me that you were seeing someone. Because it feels like you and dad only just separated. And I'm still getting used to the idea that the two of you are no longer together."
Claudia's eyes were sympathetic. She walked forward and sat at the edge of Faith's bed. She leaned closer and hugged her daughter.
At first Faith did not move. But after a moment, she brought her arms up and hugged her mother back.
When they pulled apart, Claudia looked into her eyes. "I promise to be more honest with you in the future, okay? I will tell you what is happening in my life."
"Okay."
"But you have to tell me how you are feeling as well. I'm not a mind-reader, Faith. You have to talk to me. Communicate with me."
"Okay."
It was quiet again. "Okay," Claudia stood up. "Well, I need to get back to work. I'll see you at dinner."
"Mhm," Faith nodded, and then her mother was gone.

______

Faith was at Hope's house. The Chamberlain's were out with Matthew's family doing something involving the church, so the two had the house to themselves. Faith always loved when Hope's parents were gone. Any moment that she had in seclusion with Hope was a moment to cherish. And besides, Faith liked hanging out at Hope's house more than her own. She needed to escape from that place, not spend more time in it. And fortunately for her, Hope's place provided the solace that she so deeply required.

Hope was seated on the bench in front of her piano. She explained to Faith how she grew up playing the piano and it was one of her biggest passions. She loved writing songs and creating notes and melodies. Faith thought it was intriguing that Hope had so many talents. She was so brilliant and endowing, something Faith could only aspire to be.

She sat in silence and listened as Hope stroked the keys, playing a rhythm. She laughed when she messed up a note and would start over. Hope was self-conscious of her playing, but Faith found it astonishing and soothing. Simply sitting there listening to Hope play was enough to drive out all of her demons. It was enough to make her forget every bit of anguish and tragedy that she had ever experienced.

"Write me a song," Faith said suddenly.
Hope turned to her. "What, like, right now?"
"Yeah."
"I can't do that!" Hope laughed. "It takes me a long time to write a song. Develop the notes and everything."
"Not on the piano," Faith said, hovering her hand over Hope's. "Just write me something short and quick. Something to pass the time."
Hope stared at her. "Seriously?"
"Seriously."
Hope sighed and brought out her journal that she was always carrying around with her. "Give me a minute," she said, taking out her pencil and bringing it to the page. "I'm warning you – have very low expectations."
"Okay," Faith laughed.
She sat there and watched Hope write. How she made weird shapes with her lips when she was thinking, how she brought the pencil to her ear.
Less than five minutes passed when Hope looked up and met Faith's eyes.
"Well," Faith said. "Let's hear it!"
"It's not really a song," Hope said. "More like a verse. Or a short poem."
"I'm okay with that."
"Okay..." Hope said. "Here we go." She cleared her throat, eyes focused on the page. "There once was a girl named Faith. She lived with no time to waste. She kissed me once, she kissed me twice, she said to pick up the pace."
Faith stared at her, grinning from cheek to cheek.
Hope closed the book shut. "It's stupid, I know."
"I love it!"
"Really?"
"That was so cute. I love it."
Hope laughed. "Well, good, I'm glad."
Faith leaned in and kissed her.
"Now you have to write me one," Hope sat back and smiled.
"Me?" Faith asked. "I can't write."
"Yes you can. You can do anything."
"Oh, no."
"Come on, at least try. You can use the same algorithm as mine. Just follow the rhyming scheme."
"Lord. Seriously?"
"Just try it!"
Faith sighed in defeat. "Fine."
"Yay!" Hope clapped her hands together.
"Give me that," Faith grabbed the book from her. She opened it and put the pencil to the page. At first she couldn't think of anything; her was mind blank. But then she looked up at Hope, said her name in her head. Hope.
A few minutes later, she was finished.
"Ready?" Faith asked.
"Of course."
Faith cleared her throat and sat up straighter on the bench. "Okay," she laughed, then tried to take herself seriously to rehearse the poem. "There once was a girl named Hope. I'll admit, she was better than dope. She had eyes like an angel, her hair never tangled, and she always smelled of lilac soap."
Faith turned towards Hope to see her reaction. Hope was grinning just as widely as Faith had been.
"I'm better than dope, huh?" Hope said.
"Only slightly," Faith responded, and then Hope was kissing her, and nothing else mattered.