What Is That Supposed To Mean? (Thomas Jefferson x reader)

Mourning

  I can't accept it. He can't be gone. My brother was the only person I had left. And now it's just me.
  I know that I have my own family, and all my nieces and nephews, but Alexander was the last one who I had, that knew all of the struggles I went through.
  I've stayed in my room, and Thomas keeps knocking on the door, asking if I'm ok. He already knows the answer, but I say "yes" half heartedly anyways.
  One day, I decide to go outside. The sun is bright, and a light breeze waves the trees back and forth. Alexander would be sitting under the trees, reading or writing.
  I miss him so much.
  Chesnee runs up to me, giggling. She's so amazing, so intelligent for a little girl. She likes to wear big poofy dresses, but she also has a fiery passion. she loves reading.
  I pick her up. "Mama! What's wrong?" I know I have bags under my eyes, and I feel just as awful as I look, but I smile, and it's somewhat fake.
  "Something bad happened to mama. She lost someone very close to her. But it's ok now, because I have you and I have your papa!" I tickle her, and she squeals. Then she wraps her arms around me tightly.
  "I love you mama."
  "I love you too."