Her Last Breath~13 Reasons Why~

20

I sit down next to Mom and she gives me a slight smile. "Are you okay, baby?" I just give her a nod and turn my attention back to the blonde. I zone out for the rest of the hearing mostly. They say I can go so I go into the bathroom and just sit on the floor.

Mom comes in and locks the door behind her, sitting on the floor beside me and hugs me. I try my hardest not to cry but I end up doing so. "They talk about her like she wasn't even a person... like she's just a body." I say. Mom just holds me and whispers I know to me.

After a while the bell rings and I go into the hallway where Alex, Jess, and Skye are all waiting for me. "I'm fine." I say before they can say anything. they just nod. We walk to our next classes and I sit with Alex, plugging in the headphones and listening to the tape.

I told you about two of the worst decisions I ever made and the damage left behind and the people who got hurt.

There are two more stories to tell. Two more bad decisions. These are all on me. No it's not the decision to go to the party. This story is but the other story no.

Remember that story I was saving for later? Here it is. And it's all about you. Clay.

Clay, I know you're asking yourself why you're on these tapes. What could you possibly have done? What else could have happened on the night of Jessica's party?

I look over to the corner of the library where Clay is sitting, on his phone. I knew something happened between him and my sister that night just didn't know what.

Part of me was saying "ask me again". Part of me was saying "Don't go". Not even for Clay. I should have listened.

I've never told you this Clay, but I've always admired you. You are who you are and you don't care. And I always cared what other people thought of me as much as I acted like I didn't.

I bet you also wish you'd never gone to Jessica's. I bet you wish you hadn't invited me. I was so nervous that night and you made it seem so easy.

I remember this night so well. I watched them with Jeff and Alex for a good portion of the night and we placed bets for the most part. I take the headphones off and look at Alex.

"can we get out of here?" I ask Alex. He gives a nod and we sneak out of the library and to the parking lot, getting in his car.

"I don't know how much of it I can take, Alex." I say. He puts his hand on my leg. "They didn't settle. They're taking it to trial. Which means it'll be so much more." He hugs me and I just cry. I pull back and start the tape again.

And suddenly they all became you. Part of me was saying "Please don't leave". Part of me never wanted to see you again.

But you walked out the door like I told you to.

Clay. Helmet, your name does not belong on this list. But I wanted you here if I was going to tell my story. If I'm going to explain why I did what I did because you're not every other guy. You're different.

And I didn't deserve to be with someone like you. I never would. I would have ruined you. It wasn't you. It was me and everything that's happened to me.

Take care of my sister for me.

I eject the tape and turn it over, pressing play.

Now here's for the last story relating to this night. The one mistake I regret the absolute most because I should have never hurt you Myla. Little sis, this ones for you.

I press pause and look at Alex. "I need you to drive. It's my tape..." I tell him. He's quick to put the keys in and pull out while I try to relax and press play again with a shaky hand.