Clouded Dreams

Distance

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[DISTANCE]
26.02.18 - 8:06PM

I told myself I will not care when I see you

I will not take notice

Why do I still feel some form of attraction to you even though I've turned the magnets facing each other?

Even when I'm miles away I still see your face, still see the way you walk, see the way you listen to music, still see the way you break and laugh

I told myself I would forget but I find myself listening to the record on repeat holding on for dear life

I left you something those months ago

I always forget we knew each other for a few months, it feels like a lifetime.

But do any of us know what a lifetime is? Or what it feels like?

Maybe that's why I don't know, 'cause I haven't felt this in so long.

Forced relief

I'm either gone before the bond is strong, or I break it

I left that screwed up paper on the polished oak on perfect lies, if only you knew that my handwriting had no lies beneath it

"I know why you did, what you had to do"

Hate or love, does it scream revenge?

Forgive the undue, or let loose.

You tell me, Jess.

don't bother. 
out the door, gone, 
I'm thrown along with my short-lived love 
I'm never coming back, now you're quoting scriptures of forgiveness 
Remember when that was me?

you should've thought about that before you blamed me for the unforgivable

Something I never committed
 And now you're with the man you wished to be with. 
good health to you. 
Misconception

Like I said before, "I know why you did, what you had to do."

No calling,
sending letters, 
contact me, 
break all bonds, 
you mean nothing to me now, lies.

And it taunts me at night, 
it sinks my heart to the deepest trench - everyone's worried, I've too far gone. 
Is it bad that I don't listen?

My only escape from you, 
even if that is explored through anger and revenge. 
You're scared I'll come for you, so what?

Now you're scared, 
take back all accusations 
now you know what I'm capable of

I have a crack down the middle of my face that makes all run, this dark set in my eyes, 
my motives have gone - you knew the outcome

The only crack that isn't visible, 
is the one, in my heart, 
caused by years of heartache and pressure - you added to it.

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- A poem based on the story I'm working on, Written in Memory