Always Is Not Forever (Breaking Myself - Part II)

38. The One Where I Confess the Truth

[ K A B I R ' S P O V ]

"Kabir-"

"You stay out of it for once!" Shouting at Kriti, I strode to Alina's room and shut the door tightly.

How could she leave like this without a proper explanation? Why she behaved out of nowhere as if I was the culprit without explaining what I had done in the first place? Why was she so complicated?

Swirling, she gasped and shouted, "What the fuck are you doing here?"

I was about to yell, scream and shout at her for always doing what she wanted, never caring to listen to me and running away at the middle of the night like this, but all my voice died when I saw her face.

How do I yell at her? Why couldn't I raise my voice? Why to even yell at her?

"For you," I said. "How could you even say it's over?"

"Because it is!" She screamed, anger wrapping her face but eyes glistened under the weight of lights. "It's over. I hate you. I hate you so much."

"What are you talking about? At least tell me," I insisted.

I thought everything was fine between us when she had asked me to be her boyfriend, everything was fine when she had held my hand through the meeting, and now out of nowhere, she had screamed in the parking lot.

"Kabir, leave," She seethed. "I can't even look at you. I'm supposed to hate you, but look at me, hurting here." She dropped the choker from the neck. "How many times will you break my heart before I stop feeling it? How many times will I let you break me?"

What was she talking about?

Taking a deep breath, I continued, "Alina, what happened? Is this about me leaving you? I thought we were fine."

Before I could gather, she had sunk to the floor. "What you did in New York?"

"What?" I asked in confusion.

She hoisted her red soaked eyes to mine. "How it felt touching someone else? You forgot about me so easily." Laughing dryly, she threw her earrings across the room in anger. "You once said even the thought of cheating on me kills you. But here you are."

Even if her words were pinching my heart, squeezing my eyes to shut down, but all I could hear was the chant of she knows. She knows what I did in New York, she knows how I held some other girl instead of hers, she knows everything.

Didn't I and Jennifer agree that she would fucking close that bitchy mouth of hers?

I sat down in front of her, curling my hands into a fist. "Baby-"

"Don't baby me!" She screamed. "I want to break up with you, but I can't. I want to be with you, but your infidelity is hurting me."

"We were on a break," I said patiently. "I had no hope that we would be together again."

"What if I sleep with someone else?" She chuckled darkly, opened the pins from her hair and letting the curls of them fall on her face. "Why to worry? I can't even let anyone kiss me if it's not you, and you had sex with her?!" She crawled further and caught my collar in her hands. "How she felt? How it felt finally losing your virginity? You must be happy. Finally, you get to experience without anyone saying no." Her lips wobbled. "I'm imagining you and her again and again, and it's making me sick."

As her words ended, I narrowed my eyes at her face. Who did the fuck tell her we slept together?

What was she talking about?