Always Is Not Forever (Breaking Myself - Part II)

55.2. The One Where I Repent my Mistakes

[ K A B I R ' S P O V ]

Hearing the buzzing of the phone, I peered from my closed eyes and flew my hand to the table to grab my phone. Squeezing my eyes for a second, I brought the phone to my ear.

"Sir," Anjali frantic voice altered.

"Anjali, what is the time?" Frowning, I brought my phone to see the time and cursed under my breath. "Is it a time to call me? Haven't I made it clear-"

"I know," She rushed in. "But you only instructed to convey this as soon as we receive the news on the deal regarding new venture." Quickly, I sat up on the bed, spared my glance at the wrinkled side. Where was Alina now? "They called in the morning." I waited for to continue. "They don't want to work with us. They think the returns will be negative and-"

"Enough," I steeled out. "I will be in the office by nine." And before she could say further, I cut the call and threw my phone across the wall.

Standing up, I paced back and forth, running my hands through my hair. A whole month was wasted, all of the efforts made by the employees were nothing but a waste of time and energy. How would I lead a team when I couldn't even give them what they deserved? All of our hopes were on this, a new technology to benefit all the hotels.

And nothing worked.

Everything was vain.

If dad would have been here, nothing like this would have happened.

If only he was here.

I was nothing.

I was just a failure.

Good for nothing, acting as if I knew everything.

Seething, I curled my fingers around the lamp and without waiting for a warning, I threw it across the floor as if it would contain all my frustration and anger.

Business was not made for you.

Hopeless, I sat down on the bed, a despair rising in all the corners of the room. How would I do everything? How would I make everyone trust me? How would I guide a team when I didn't feel like a leader anymore?

How would Nisha feel knowing the company dad built was tumbling down to ashes because of me?

Would she hate me?

Did she think I was lucky to have everything in my name?

"Alina, leave," I said, feeling her presence behind me, but she didn't listen when I heard her coming forward. "Don't step over the glass." And soon she was next to me, slipping her fingers into mine.

We will go through everything.

Don't distance me.

She nodded slightly.

From the corner of my eye, I found Nisha hovering at the door, waiting to enter but I called her out, "Nisha, leave us alone." She shouldn't see me like this.

How would she react knowing the person who was supposed to be strong for her was nothing but a failure?

How would I take care of her when I was weak?

I didn't hear anything but dropped my head on Alina's lap, snuggling and closed my eyes as her fingers buried in my hair.

"Is she gone?" I asked.

"Yes. Kabir, she is hurt."

"I can't let her see me like this." I drew figures on her upper thigh with my index finger. "She needs me strong."