CHAPTER 27
blurred intentions
April 28, 2013 (Sunday)
Jasmine's POV
a felt a big whole in my heart. It pains to know na ang bagay na akala mong sayo iba pa rin pala ang may ari.
i dont want to be stupid but yeah Honestly i thought we had a CHANCE. Being kaileen out of the picture. yet i was wrong.
hindi naman maling umasa diba? lalo na kung siya mismo ang nagbibigay sa akin ng motivation na umasa.
"alam ko yang mukhang yan"
biglang may nagsalita sa likod ko hindi ko napansin na ang lalim na pala ng iniisip ko.
i gave out a weak smile
"best, dont fake it. Di mo bagay"
i answered her with a deep sighed
"i never thought you fall hard, well that hard you know, kasi akala ko ba tanggap mo sa sarili mo na si kaileen ang mahal niya?"
Here is the hard thing about having friends who have big mouth.
They always say the right things and IT HURTS..
"hello!!! anybody there? hindi naman siguro ako baliw na kausap ko sarili ko diba?" marianne said while waiving her hand infront of my face
"what do you want me to say na, 'best oo tama ka masakit' masakit talaga"
i didnt have enough firm in my head to stop the tear that fallen on my left cheek
"hey thats why am here para may makausap ka"
she caress my back to help me calm down
i hug her. and gave out small sobs
"akala ko pwede eh, akala ko kaya ko siyang palitan, kala ko kaya ko siyang tulungan. para kalimutan siya, pinigilan ko naman talaga eh Believe me. I tried my best to stop myself from falling for dee kaso wala matigas ulo ko eh ayun i didnt put too much effort to stop my heart kaya ayun, nasaktan ako. nasasaktan ako best. ang sakit sakit"
hinayaan lang ako mag vent out ni marianne
it was silent for awhile
then she speak after a minute
"Dont be hard on yourself best, It wasnt only you who thought na baka posible nga na maging kayo, Maniwala ka na kahit pati kami nina seth,lester at kasumi ganun din ang naisip"
i wasnt able to respond. umayos lang ako ng upo at pinunasan ang luha ko.
"And i know for a fact that Dee cant deny it as well na inakala din niya deep inside na baka nga posible... its just that bago pa man masimulan ang lahat, natapos na nung dumating ulit si kaileen"
she gave me water to drink
"I mean no harm kay kaileen, pero I actually didnt expect na babalik pa siya after what she did to Dee. Alam ko gago si Dee but that was ANCIENT. Matino na siya. Ironic man pakinggan pero look wala pa akong kilalang EX ni Dee na niloko siya na sing tindi ng ginawa ni Kai, So for her to show up again is a mystery"
napaisip din ako sa mga sinasabi ni marianne. bakit nga ba? 'Bakit ka pa bumalik kaileen' paulit ulit kong tinataning sa sarili ko.
***************
April 29, 2013 (Monday)
DEINZ'S POV
"so kayo na ba ulit?" tanong sa akin ni seth
