Love and War

always and forever

Y/Ns POV

i felt colby lay his head on mine. with his small gesture, i slowly drifted asleep as i thought about the dance. i wish sam was still here he didnt deserve to die it should have been me.

my thoughts raced and i tried to push them away but failed. thats when it came back. i thought it would be gone forever but this situation must have brought it back. it brought back to stone cold voice in my head. i got this voice when i was 7 she would come and go and when i turned 12 she left forever until now. i started to hear her again.

hello again you rotten little girl thought you could get rid of me did you?

yes i did but clearly not 

oh dearie i will never be gone....EVER!

i deserve to hear your insults i killed my best friend i deserve it 

wow the brat grew up she trying to seem tough when we know she isn't

hit me with it 

if you say so... his death is your fault because if it weren't for you he wouldn't have tried it in the first place 

im sorry sam 

i wonder what the police would do if they knew, lock you up starve you because your fat ass needs to lose some serious weight your one meal away from breaking the floor you sitting on 

i am fat arent i? 

75% of your body weight is muscle and seeming to you have none only about 20% of your weight is muscle which means... your still fucking fat

i shot my head up and looked around the room wondering where i was. i was in a hospital cuddling with Colby. as i thought back to what happened earlier almost immediately after remembering i started to cry into my knees waking up colby. he stroked my back in comfort and held my hand

"he was my everything" i cried soaking my knees with tears 

"i understand that but hes gone and i need to fill the void but i want you to know im here. always and forever" 

word count: 345 words