Loving Lucian ✅

Chapter Forty One

As soon as it was just us, he put his hands in the pockets of some white joggers amd sighed deeply. "How are you feeling?" He pursed his lips with not even a hint of warmness to his face. He continued to stare at my stomach, I'm sure he didn't even realize he was excessively staring.

I peered up at him and I felt like I was quivering under his gaze and about to erupt in tears. "Uh, fine, I guess. My eye still kinda hurts, so does the rest of my body, but other than that...I'm peachy."

He nodded, and got right to the chase with saying, "you're pregnant. A full two and a half months pregnant."

I couldn't help getting choked up. "Yeah. It's name is Rory, if the doctors didn't tell you." He broke into a breathy little bitter laugh, looking down at his feet as he forward leaned on his hands on my bed. "Rory? You've named it? James or Montenegro?" He asked, and something stung in my chest. "Lucian, it's your—"

"Clearly, it's not my child, Peyton. Because right now, in my head, your plan was to break up with me before I noticed your bump, and move away so you could have a child without my knowing." He wouldn't be totally wrong, but I wasn't planning to move away.

"Well, would it be that despicable if that was the plan? I've been listening to you talk about how much you basically think that children are the enemy, so how the fuck am I supposed to think that I can come to you pregnant and ready to tell you the news?"

"It's called trust, Peyton! I mean—w-what happened to faith? I was ready to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to grow old with you too, Peyton. But if you insist on feeling as if you can't come to me, like you don't need me to help you through all these problems, then maybe we shouldn't be together, what would be the point if the one thing we need is the one thing that we're missing?"

"For God's sake, Peyton," his voice broke, he was starting to tear up and so was I. "Whether big or small, you come to me about everything! If you're scared, it's okay! Because chances are, I'm gonna be scared too! But that's the whole point. That there's never any secrecy, never anything that drives us apart. Because I love you more than anything on this Earth. And I always will no matter what. I almost died for you, Peyton, I think it's obvious that I love you. You're just it for me. I mean, we're having a baby, I'm gonna be a father. I'm fucking terrified." He kept rubbing his hands over his face, like he didn't like crying in front of me. From the looks of how red he was getting, you'd think he was embarrassed.

I rubbed my belly, hopeful when I ask, "so that means you want to keep it?"

"I don't have a choice. It's a life created by you and I, I have a responsibility now. But it doesn't mean we're back together. I've thought about it...I..I think we should stay broken up, and I think we can handle this without having to make a huge commotion about custody. I expect you to get your things out of my penthouse when you're released from the hospital, and your key, as well. And I guess, this is the last time I see you until then. So good...goodbye," his muscles flexed with every word, like it hurt so much to part ways with me.

My heart rate increased to 186 bpm.

I sniffled, but wanted to be as strong as he was trying to be so I held it in and croaked out, "bye, Lucian." But he turned and walked away before I could get the full phrase out. I covered my face with my shaky hand, and my face felt burning hot as I gasped violently with attempts to keep from bawling.

Lucian Montenegro

I opened the door to see them, and it's not that I don't love my family and hers, it's just that I really didn't feel like being treated like a basket case. My mother opened her mouth to ask what everyone was going to ask, so I beat her to the answer, closing the door gently and making my way to my hospital room. "I'm–I'm fine. I just want to be alone." I rubbed my eyes and around my face, my face was soaked from all these damn tears.