Behind the Pain

Complicated Past

We both decide its best if we go do our own thing after arriving back at the studio it's not that we were angry with each other it's just we both came here for a reason and could feel giving each other space would be the best thing. It allowed me to basically finish all the work that needed to he finished this week, but knowing jimmy and the record label there will be new things to do by tomorrow.

It it only took me half an hour until the guilt started to rise within me, making me get very distracted and of course because all I can I think about is how I treated Marshall and became cold towards him after that comment. Trust me I didn't mean to, I guess it's just a normal way for me to react because everyone seems to judge me without knowing the whole truth , and since Marshall is my boss and judged me at the start I guess I snapped because I didn't want that happening again. I don't want this getting round the label since I love my job and the people I work with, so it doesn't matter how much I am bad at apologizing I know making this right is the best thing to do.

Quietly I make my way over towards his studio, thankfully the door is ajar because it allows me to see if I am interrupting anything or if I have caught him in a bad mood.
And just like I guess he looks stressed and tired like he hasn't slept in days. He is slouching in a chair in front of the recording table with pieces of paper scattered in front of him, obviously the lyrics that are not good enough.

" Maybe you should consider calling it a night and come back to it tomorrow, they say when your stuck having a clear head helps give you better perspective" I commented from the doorway as I leaned again the doorframe watching as he keeps getting frustrated over these lyrics.

" Yeah maybe, or it will keep me up or night bugging me until I get it right" he said coldly after glancing back and seeing who is interrupting him, I guess I understand why he is being cold and short with me, I did partially stop talking to him after his comment towards my son's appearance.
Knowing I have to try and resolve this iciness between us I take a step into the studio.

" Yeah your probably right. " I softly said as I began walking towards him, placing my hands in my pockets as I thought of how to start this conversation.

" I just .....wanted to...come and apologize for being so moody and quiet after your comment in the car, I shouldn't have been such a bitch to you " I stumbled quietly as I thought of words to say to him, I know he is still a human being but trust me I have never been good at apologizing to people, but since Marshall has apologized to me a couple of times after doing something wrong or disrespectful I know he deserves the same. And Just from the surprise look on his face I guess he wasn't expecting for me to apologize either.

" Don't worry about it, to tell you the truth I sometimes get upset when people bring up certain things about my family, even if they don't intentionally do it" he replied while placing his pen down before grabbing the chair next to him and slowly rolling it towards me, probably his way of gesturing me to sit down beside him.

" You know I wasn't judging you or anything" he continued as I sat down in the chair next to him, I can see in his eyes that he is telling the truth and that his comment before was simply an observation, but me being me just had to take it to heart.

" I know you weren't, but I guess in a way you saying he doesn't look like my ex just automatically made me assume you were thinking the worst" I calmly said as I got comfortable in the chair beside Marshall, who is facing me looking very caring and interested in what I have to say which is surprising.

" Why do you think I was assuming the worst? " he asked nicely while looking at me very curious as to why I thought that and what the worst possibly is anyway.

" Because every one does, as soon as they see that Hayden looks nothing like my ex husband, they tend to come to the conclusion that I was a slut when I was younger and Hayden actually belongs to another guy" I replied, making sure to smile softly at the end. even though I am beginning to open up to Marshall I don't want him to think I m some depressed girl who has all this baggage with her.