Behind the Pain

Another day

" how you feeling? " Royce asked as I made my way to the breakfast table where everyone usually sits round before these day starts. I've been here for two days and both of those days have been horrible, firstly I can't seem to keep hardly anything I eat down, not having my medication is making me feel so tired and heavy plus I have to put up with Marshall and Hilary being all over each other all the time, not caring how public there affection seems to be.

" I'm alright" I replied lying a little, Royce has been so good these last couple of days always making sure im not over doing it or eating even though I spew it back up within half an hour later.

I watched as Marshall and Hilary walked to the dining room table where everyone was eating and started their own thing, I don't even know why I agree to come to these breakfast with the staff members I hardly even eat anything plus it's hard watching Marshall and Hilary all over each other when I really wish it was me. Since the incident Marshall hasn't even spoken to me only when it was about business and even than he's still has bitter in his voice. And than there is Hillary who rarely says a nice thing to me, I don't know If Marshall has told her not to talk to me all she just is a bitch all the time.

" here try this it's just dried muesli" Royce said putting a bowl in front of me with dried muesli and fruit. He doesn't seem to care that everyone is looking at us wondering why Royce is basically getting my breakfast for me, but I already can tell they have jumped to conclusions and for some reason think we are in a secret relationship, it doesn't help when Hilary starts commenting and joking about how close we are, and how she initiates that Royce might have a crush on me, but we seem to ignore all the whispers about us or the glares we are getting from Marshall who is sitting across from us.

" thanks" I smiled looking down at the bowl, half of me hearing my tummy rumbling but than the other half getting queasy just looking at it. I'm very thankful for Royce, not a lot of friends would do what he is doing, he Knows I can hardly keep anything down and have been so dehydrated these last couple of days, but still he doesn't stop placing meals in front I me and trying to get me to eat something even if it's a little biscuit because he knows of if he doesn't I would just go without food all together.

I play with my food, watching as the milk soaks more of the muesli up soon making it soft and disgusting. Royce has gone to chill with some of the guys in the other room, trying to give me space and not put a lot of pressure on as I don't eat my breakfast for the third time since being here.

" Andrea someone keeps calling your phone?" Royce says coming back into the room, oh great who keeps constantly calling me at this time, I know it's probably my sons just checking up on me but I'm not really in the mood.

" can you just tell them I will call back later" I reply to Royce on the other side knowing very well that a lot of people are listening and again talking about Royce's and I friendship, but jut like before we know it's ridiculous the constant whispering and as Royce looks over at me he can tell I'm way to tired to talk at the moment so begins answering my phone

" oh um it's doctor Barn . Wants to know if you mind coming in at 10
Rather than 10:30 today for your appointment?" He asked trying to be a little bit quieter and more secretive but still a lot of the guys couldn't help but listen intently.

Glancing down at my clock I saw that 10 was only an hour away, I want sure If I was going to make It.

" yeah tell him that's fine, I'll be there soon" I replied smiling a little knowing since I have my appointment coming up than that's a good excuse for getting our of breakfast and not Having to eat this shit.

Slowly I continued reading through the magazine, knowing I have a few minutes until I have to leave and get ready for this appointment, but I still could sense something was on Hilary's mind because she hasn't stopped staring at me from across the table, until I looked up at her with a questioning look and seeing her finally break from curiosity.