Behind the Pain

Its just work

" hey man thanks for making this meeting later on" I said politely to Jay Z as him and his crew arrived at the stadium the following day to get ready and rehearse some songs. This big tour is coming up jn a couple of days and it starts here in Detroit so we all have to be ready.

" no worries to be honest I was completely stunned when you told me Andrea has breast cancer. I had no idea she was even sick" he explained as we got settled in the backstage area. You see I had to tell him about Andrea because he wanted to do all these meetings in the morning but since Andrea needs to still have radiation for a few more days than it wouldn't have worked out and she would have been pushing to make it on time, plus she would be so exhausted it just wasn't fair.
Luckily when I told Jay he completely understood and jimmy also realized how exhausted she was going to be, so now he's happy to do this meeting in a couple of hours giving Andrea enough time to come by and get ready.

Today was hot, but luckily I wasn't set to rehearse instead I've actually just finished filming the last bit of my interview for 60 minutes, the guy just wanted to have a few shots of the stadium before next week shows which was pretty cool to film, I'm quite excited for it to come out and for others to see this more mature side of me. I know for a fact that there will be parts in there that shock and surprise people.

Knowing there was no point in leaving since it's getting later I Just around the stadium hanging out with the guys who arrived to also rehearse for their songs, you see I have D12 opening up with B.O.B so they had to rehearse as well which of course they had to bring all their entourage along with them.
I'm not complaining or anything I'm just glad that there not all filing into my studio to hang out, I think there's been enough drama involving groupies for this week and right now I'm just happy it all worked itself out and Andrea is still giving me another chance to show her how much she means to me.

Last night when Andrea and I left the studio to talk out our problems it really helped. I was so amazed how things seemed to get easy as soon as we left the studio, it's like god knew we had to step out of that cage and into a new environment to completely calm down and talk about it rationally.
We drove and got takeaway before heading to a lookout and talking, it was there when I actually thought about everything that had happened that day and saw it in a new light. I realized how completely idiotic my behavior was especially when I got so possessive over her that I actual didn't want her to have any communication with her ex, that's how stupid I was reacting but after calming Down and thinking about it I knew I didn't have any right to ask her to stop speaking to him.

I also actually saw her change her tune about the whole Skylar thing, I know what I did was a little bit wrong but after talking about it she kind of eased up on the situation she walked in on and understood that she's going to have to get used to girls flirting with me constantly. Im not saying I'm going to sit back and let them flirt, it's just she's figured out that there are going to be some girls that flirt with me but she's the only girl I want to be with.
Don't get me wrong, this doesn't mean I'm going to let them, I don't want to anyway, because I have to admit even yesterday when Skylar was flirting with me all I could think about was Andrea and how much more sexier she is at flirting and how much I want her more than any other girl.

Anyway getting back on track and coming back to earth Ive just realized I've been thinking once again about Andrea as I'm standing here with the guys from my crew as they started mingling with young groupies and other guys from different entourages and crews. I know Jay Z and Wayne are only a few feet away so a lot of the guys are from New York and LA.
I just stayed quiet while standing around and listening to their conversations. Luckily Fifty is here Right beside so he would let me know if I'm looking quiet strange of if you can tell my mind has wandered of.