Loving River

Loving eight

"I love you, and that's the beginning and end of everything."

Semmy Carson

I will always remember the first day that I realized that I was in love with River.

"Mom, I'm home!" Twelve year old Semmy yelled in a bubbly mood since he just got back from his best friend.

He walked towards the kitchen to find his mother making dinner. Back then, his mother and father were much more around the house to take care of their son. Unfortunately that didn't take very long, but that was a story for another time.

"You're back!" She smiled happily at her son and gave a kiss on his forehead. "Were you with River again?" His mom asked as she cooked further.

"Yes! It was really fun, we played video games and went to the woods to built a treehouse for only the two of us!" The little boy almost jumped from excitement as he told this to his mom.

Just talking about his best friend, made him feel happy, a smile grew on his face and his eyes sparkled up.

"That sound nice sweetie. I'm glad you had fun and that you met River. You two almost look like a couple" She laughed soft and ruffled her hand through her son's dark brown hair.

"A couple?" The boy asked confused, not knowing what that meant.

"Yeah, like when you're in a relationship with someone. You're in love with that person"  She answered, thinking about her husband with who she created her beautiful son with.

The boy watched how his mother continued cooking, yet he couldn't help but wonder.

"Mom..?"

"Yes Semmy?"

"What is love?" The boy asked his mom curiously.

"Love is.. something great, almost magical. It can do so many things to you. Your heart starts beating faster, the air gets sucked away from you, you feel weak in your knees and your hands are shaking whenever that person walks into the room. The atmosphere in the room changes and you lit up from them in the best way ever possible. Their touch makes you feel tingles and something magnetic, your heart skips a beat. They never fail to make you smile or laugh, your head is clouded with thoughts of them and even talking about them, makes your heart flutter in a good way. You just always want to be with them" The mother told him full with passion and faithfulness.

The boy kept thinking for a while as he thought back of the many memories he had with his best friend, of how he always laughed even if there was nothing funny about his jokes, of how he felt his heart burst with happiness or how he always wanted to be in his presence.

"Why honey?" His mother asked after a moment of silence.

"Oh.. Nothing" Her son answered, knowing he was doomed, because he could relate himself to all those things when it came to River Allen.

River and I had an argument a short while ago. I had been thinking of a plan to make it up to him, because I couldn't go on like this for longer than an hour.

We hardly fought, but when we did, we could never stay away from each other longer than two hours.

Maybe it was also because he was the only one that I had in this life, he was also the one that I loved dearly even though it was one sided. But I could live with that as long as I still had him.

River would always have me, even when he didn't want me and if I would ever confess my feelings to him, then that would be the beginning and end of everything.

I started pacing around in my room, thinking of an idea. I didn't want to normally apologize. I wanted to do something more for him, because he deserved that.

I shouldn't have gotten so angry at him. He was looking out for me and I was just being selfish, longing for another friend.

My train of thoughts were interrupted when the bell rang. A sigh left my mouth as I walked towards the front door, asking myself who would be visiting me. My parents were always gone and I wasn't exactly popular at school.

My heart skipped a beat when I opened the door.

"River?" I frowned confused as the gorgeous boy stood in front of me.

"Hey Sem.."

"W-what are you d-doing here?" I asked and watched his sculptured face.

He looked pretty beat up and tired. The usual smiley gray eyes looked a bit dull from sadness. His whole body language told me that he felt bad, making me feel immense guilty. Stupid me got angry at him and now he was sad.

Why are you even standing there Semmy?! Apologize to him!

"I- I can't tell you how sorry I am Sem.. That was really stupid and selfish of me, to even forbid you to hang out with other people. I don't know what came over to me Semmy, I really care about you, your my best friend and I don't want you to get hurt like all those last times.." He rambled with big eyes, he didn't even take a break to breath and I felt even more sorry for him.

Why was I so stupid to say what I thought?! He was right all along.

"Hey, Riv.. Calm down, it's alright okay? I get it. I was the one who was selfish and dumb. You were just looking out for me and arrogant Semmy wanted to have friends so badly.. I'm sorry" I snorted disappointed at myself.

How could I have been so egoistical?

"No no Semmy, that's not true at all! God.. You are too good for this world. You deserve more friends and I understand that you got happy when someone showed some interest in you. It's totally understandable, I shouldn't have been so stupid.." He said as he took a step closer to me.

My breath hitched in my throat when the distance between us shortened. I wanted to pull him even closer to me, feel his breath, touch and warmth. He made me feel safe and sound, I was never afraid to get close to him.

"So.. do you forgive me?" He asked me and I could hear the hope in his voice.

My heart skipped another beat just from his beauty.

"Of course I do Riv.. Always" I smiled wide when he enveloped me into a hug.

I closed my eyes as I leaned against him, I wrapped my arms around his neck. This felt so good that it should be a crime.

"I was actually just inside, thinking about a way to apologize to you and funny enough you already stood in my doorstep" I giggled soft and burried my head in his neck.

God I loved his hugs more than anything in this universe.

"I guess we are just soulmates" He laughed jokingly and rubbed my back in a soothing manner.

Soulmate; a person with whom you have an immediate connection the moment you meet – a connection so strong that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever loved anyone prior.