My Love, My Saviour, My Student •Shawn Mendes

7.

Shawn Mendes
I put on a tight black t shirt and black jeans as I got ready to go to the Sense and Sensibility performance. I was going alone tonight even though I had a message from Hailey asking if I wanted her to come with me. But i had to decline her offer. I was happy to go alone, and I was pretty sure I would see Miss Dawson there tonight. But I had to think about it. I didn't know if it would be acceptable to go up to her and sit with her. And I didn't know if she would even come over if she saw me. But I couldn't think about that. I was just going to enjoy the performance.
I set off for the theatre and drove past her house but all the lights were off. I pulled up to the theatre and got out of my car with my ticket in hand. I entered the little lobby of the theatre and waited for the doors to open. It was quarter past seven and I looked round for her when I felt a tap on my shoulder.
"Mr Mendes" a quiet voice said and I smiled turning around.
"I knew you'd come" I told her and she smiled holding up her ticket. "Would you like a drink?" I asked her being a bit cautious.
"Oh erm just a water please if that's ok?" She asked and I nodded my head telling her to wait there.

"I don't know if it's inappropriate but can we sit together?" Faye asked and I shrugged.
"We're not on school grounds so I think it's acceptable" I smiled and we walked into the auditorium. "Where do you want to sit. I usually prefer the back" I told her and she nodded walking up to the very back row in the corner, as if we were the cliché couple in a movie theatre.
"Is this ok Mr Mendes?" She asked and I cleared my throat.
"Miss Dawson I think it might be better if you called me by my first name" I whispered to her and she nodded. "Shawn" I said holding my hand out to her.
"Oh my god you have the same name as my cat" she laughed shaking my hand. "Don't worry she's adorable"
"She?"
"Oh we didn't know it was a girl when we called her Shawn" Faye explained and I had to laugh along with her. The performance started and the noise of the auditorium disappeared.

We were sat through the second half of the play and it was getting towards the end with the happy endings coming into account. It was getting to my favourite part where Edward confessed his love for Eleanor and I looked toward Faye. Her hands dangled off the chair arm close to mine and I saw a smile play on her lips at his confession of love. I moved my arm and felt her hand brush against mine. Without taking our eyes off of the stage I felt her little finger brush against my own, I moved my hand so two of my fingers were over hers. She made the next move as if it were a game so her small, cold hand was underneath my large one. She pushed her hand forward slightly as I bent back my fingers to be interlocked with hers.
It was as if something took over me. Over both of us. As if the words spoken on the stage ignited the feeling of needing a feeling of our own. I heard her take a deep breath in and back out and I did the same as the lights came back up in the auditorium and the performance ended, but I still didn't let go of her hand, and she didn't make an attempt to get her hand out of my grasp. She cleared her throat and I saw most people had left their seats. She pulled her hand away and stood up.
"Do you need a ride home?"
"Yes please" She said barely above a whisper.

I opened the car door for her and she clambered into the car. "So what did you think of the play?" I asked her trying to break the silence.
"I liked it thank you for the ticket" she nodded and I nodded as well. We fell into a silence and I could feel the tension between us build up. It was suffocating, and it was wrong. I was her teacher, even if there wasn't that bad of an age gap between us I was still her teacher. It was wrong, but I wanted it to be right. I had never been drawn to someone like this before. I gripped the steering wheel harder as we pulled into Faye's driveway.
"Well erm, thanks, again, Mr erm Shawn" She said reaching for the car door and I smiled at her as she walked into her home. I took a deep breath and composed myself before driving to the end of the land and parking my car in the garage next to my house.
"Bad move Shawn bad move" I said to myself as I thought about tonight's hand holding event. I tried to make sense of what had happened. But it all went so quickly, and it happened from nothing. But I thought about the tension in the car. Did she feel something as well as me? No no she couldn't. She's a smart girl, she wouldn't ever think about a teacher in any way more than a teacher. Or would she? It was messing with my mind as I tried to sleep. I wanted so badly to ask her but I knew it would be inappropriate as the only place I would see her was during school hours.
What was going on inside my mind? It was something even I couldn't understand. The way I felt was something unknown something dangerous, and it wasn't like me at all, but I couldn't deny that I felt some way towards her. I just needed to figure out what feeling that was and get rid of it.