Why am I like this?
Why do I act all nice until someone threatens themselves?
What is it about others wellbeing that turns me into an utter bitch?
Do I care too much? Do I pretend not to too much? I dont know.
I dont know why I hurt others when they try to help.
I dont know why I put others above myself.
I dont know why I just drift away from them.
Why can't I just stay and listen instead of talking and threatening?
What happened to us; what happened to me?
How'd everything become so different?
How'd I change into someone different?
Why do I think threatening will make them stop?
I'm supposed to be the voice of reason. The one who makes everything better.
The one who'll listen to your problems and help you through them.
I've lost so many friends that I care about because of this. Because of me.
Because of the dumb shit that I end up repeating every time with every friend.
The damn reason why I'm alone right now.
The reason why I'll be alone forever.
The reason is me.
It all started with me being alone and that's how it'll end.
It'll never change because I will never change.
If only I could do that then I could do anything.
I feel like it doesn't matter. Either way I'll die. Might as well watch the ones I lost get better while I wait.
