Crave | nomin

十八

It was now a couple days before jaemin's 18th birthday, he had been extra clingy with jeno again but at the same time he still had that uneasy feeling in his stomach and chest.

They were spending the day with all of their main friends, that included the lovely chenle, Jisung, renjun, mark, and donghyuck. The seven boys were currently at jaemin's house, since it was summer their parents were allowing them to spend the last couple of days before the boys birthday at his house to celebrate. Jaemin's parents made sure they weren't there for most of the days and only came back for dinner and to sleep, they didn't want to get in the way of jaemin's celebrating.

Renjun had been uneasy about the whole thing and really didn't want to even come out of his room, let alone spend a couple of days with jaemin and chenle. He had shown up anyways, he tried his best to seem normal and okay but jeno saw right through him. Jeno was a lot smarter than people thought he was, he knew when any of his friends were upset.

"Hey renjun can I talk to you?" Jeno asked quietly once jaemin detached himself from him and played Just Dance with Donghyuck. Renjun was nervous but followed jeno out of the room anyways, the younger led them to jaemin's empty kitchen. Jeno sat himself on top of jaemin's counter while renjun stood there awkwardly, fiddling with his fingers and staring at his shoe laces. "I know somethings up with you and chenle, but I know something else is bothering you too. I just can't figure out what" jeno said and renjun felt anxiety crawl up his throat.

"I-I its just ugh" renjun stuttered and mumbled quietly, he was afraid to tell jeno what was wrong but at the same time he wanted to get it off his chest. "You don't have to tell me if you're uncomfortable" jeno reassured and swung his feet back and forth slowly. "No, no I'm not uncomfortable. I just don't know how to say it" renjun spoke up a little and looked up at jeno shyly. "Well just tell me what's on your mind, I won't judge you I promise" jeno said kindly and gave the older a reassuring smile.

"Well uhm, Chenle and I have been distant as you can see" the older started to explain, looking down at the ground again. "and there's a reason why, I uh uhm" he started again and jeno shook his head for the boy to continue. "I-I started to feel this tingling and burning on my arm, like what I felt when I received my first soulmate tattoo" at the word first jeno quirked an eyebrow and was suddenly more interested than he was before. "and I got scared and distanced myself from him, I think he noticed the tattoo forming and got mad at me for not telling him but I'm too scared to tell him the truth." Renjun continued and looked up at jeno with sad eyes.

"I-I still love him, I love him a lot and I tried apologizing but he keeps ignoring me" renjun's eyes started to water and jeno panicked. "renjun it's okay, you don't have to keep telling me" jeno spoke up but renjun shook his head and continued. "the name, the name that's forming on my arm is what scares me the most." he started and broke eye contact with jeno. "The name forming is someone who was really special to me once, but now they're special to someone else. They're not mine anymore" he said quietly and felt a tear roll down his cheek. "I got over them but someone brought them back into my life, I was doing fine until this stupid tattoo started to form" renjun's voice got angrier as he continued and more tears streamed down his face. Jeno wasn't sure what to do besides letting the boy continue.

"T-the name is a boy, and I didn't want to feel anything towards him but it won't stop jeno. The feeling won't fucking go away and I feel so helpless and guilty all the time" renjun looked up with teary eyes and jeno hopped off the counter to comfort the older male in front of him. "H-he already has a soulmate, and I already have a soulmate. I don't understand!" Renjun cried harder and jeno engulfed the older in a hug, his arms around the boys shoulders while renjun cried into his chest. "Who is it?" Jeno asked hesitantly, afraid of the answer he was going to receive.

"J-jaemin, it's fucking jaemin" renjun stuttered and jeno felt his heart stop, he didn't know how to feel about any of this. "I uh, uhm" jeno was speechless and renjun just hugged him tighter. "I'm so sorry, I'm really sorry" renjun sobbed harder and jeno just held him tighter, he couldn't be mad at renjun. It wasn't the older's choice to get jaemin's name and it wasn't his choice to feel something for the boy. It hurt him but there was nothing he could do but comfort his friend. "Jaemin's been acting weird lately, he's been really sad and confused but he won't tell me why" jeno said quietly and renjun calmed down. "He was distant with me for a while but the other day he broke down in my arms and told me he loved me, he's been super clingy ever since" jeno continued and stared off into space.

Renjun had stopped crying by now and looked up at jeno softly. "I think it's because of you" he said and renjun sighed, his eyes were all red and puffy but he felt much better than before. "You guys should talk about it or something" jeno said and rested his chin on renjun's head, the older placed his head back on jeno's chest and hugged the boy tightly. They sat like that in silence until jaemin barged into the kitchen searching for them. "O-oh uhm sorry, I'll just go then" the youngest said quietly, a hurt expression on his face.

"No babe come here" jeno turned his head and let go of renjun, he grabbed onto jaemin's arm and pulled him back towards them. "Renjun was upset so I was comforting him, but I think you guys should talk" jeno said and kissed jaemin on the lips quickly before walking out and back into the living room where the rest of their friends were.

Kind of a cliffhanger oops :) but anyways.... we have a whole ass noren chapter for you aha funnn. I'm trying to prolong jaemin's birthday for as long as I can cause I was aiming for it to be actually near his birthday but I don't think that's gonna happen rip.

ALSO DID YOU GUYS SEE THE N'44 00's VLIVE?? NOMIN WAS S A I L I N G WOWOW I LOVE BOYFRIENDS :,))

I'm not crying, you are.

I hope you guys enjoyed :)) I love you !!

- j