Thantophobia

2

You will always be important to me.

E

"What are you thinking about?" I look up from my glass of champagne to see Frankie.

"Oh nothing. Just how happy I am for you." I tell him taking the last sip from my drink.

"You sure? I figured it was because of Harry." He says and I almost choke on my drink.

"Why would that be a problem?" I turn to face him.

"Oh, come on Ellie. Don't think I couldn't tell that you liked him in high school." I close my eyes and feel my cheeks blush.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" I cross my arms.

"Honestly, I was waiting for him to say something to me or you, but it never happened." He explains.

"Well, he obviously didn't feel the same way since he left five years ago and never came back."

"Maybe he didn't want to get attached to you because he was leaving. Maybe it just wasn't the right time but maybe now it is." Frankie exclaims.

"No, it's defiantly the wrong time because he came here with someone else." I tell him.

"How about you just go talk to him. Catch up for a bit. You know you've missed him and I'm sure he feels the same." Frankie grabs me and brings me into a hug.

"Now, go and have fun. This is my wedding!" He laughs and kisses my head. I roll my eyes and turn back to the bar and order another drink.

It's been about an hour of me sitting here alone at the bar. Watching everyone dancing and my brother and his wife look so in love and I can't help but be jealous. I've always wanted someone to be by my side. To make me happy when I'm sad and love me for who I am. I'm 22 and I know that is still pretty young, but I feel as if I've already missed out on a lot. Most people my age are either married and have kids or are in a relationship. I've never had a boyfriend and I know it's partially my fault because I closed people off and never put myself out there. When my parents died, it just go worse. The only person I talked to was Frankie. I didn't have friends at college. I stayed in my dorm and never went out because I was just so depressed, and my anxiety got worse because I shut myself out from the world. I'm sure guys thought I was weird and awkward. The only time I would talk was if I was called in class or we had to do projects together. Trust me, I hate myself for closing myself off because I know I missed out on so much, but I can't take any of that back.

I finish my what I think is my third glass of champagne and stand up. I look up and instantly my eyes are met with Harry's. Oh god. I get shivers all over my body and I want to cry for some reason. I've missed him so much and he looks so beautiful. He whispers something into the girl's ear he is sitting next to and gets up. He walks toward me, and I feel like I might pass out. He stops a few feet in front of me.

"Hi Ellie." His voice is even heavier.

"Hi Harry." My voice cracks and I clear my throat.

We both just stand there staring at each other before he gets closer and wraps his arms around me. I instantly react and wrap mine around him. Oh, how I've missed this.

"God, I've missed you Ellie." He whispers in my ear. I can feel the tears swell up in my eyes and I try to keep them in, but it's too late. They start falling down my cheeks and Harry wraps his arms tighter around me.

"I'm sorry." I choke on the words.

"No, there is absolutely nothing for you to be sorry about." He strokes the back of my head and kisses my forehead. I move away from him and look up at him.