If Only

Help

The chalk boards were all covered in writing and there was a huge stack of paper on one desk. This is what I missed in his class? He said he was teaching me everything from the beginning of the year. That explains a lot.

By the time I left we were only half way through the papers. I would be back before support group tomorrow. When I got home I had missed dinner. I went upstairs to start on my homework. I finished it as my mom was coming upstairs for bed. I went to get a shower and all but fell onto my bed half asleep.

After school I did the same thing but instead of math tutoring I went straight to social studies. We finished the papers today. I got up and collected my things. Support group is in twenty minutes. I was about to leave when Mr. Brace spoke. "Do you want a ride? I've noticed that you walk to group." I simply nodded and said thank you. We headed out to his car. It was a short ride filled with small talk. When we got there we went in together. He went to get lemonade while I just sat down. I never eat the cookies or drinks the lemonade. Too many calories in them.

After the meeting he offered to drive me home. But I declined saying I wanted to walk. As soon as he turned around I went in the opposite way of home. I started to run to the gym. I haven't gone in a few days because of school and it was showing.

When I got home it was 8 pm. I went right upstairs to study. By the time I went to bed it was passed one am. And after a few minutes of restless turning I figured I wasn't going to sleep any time soon. So I took out my phone. I had a few new messages. I read them all. I got out of bed and walked over to my window. I climbed out onto the roof and sat down. I watched the cars pass my house and listened to the crickets. It reminds me of home. Not the one I'm in now but my real home. I lied down and closed my eyes. Before I knew it I fell asleep to the sounds of the crickets.

I was picking blueberries at my grandparents house back home. They had a whole field of blueberry bushes. More were going into my mouth then into my basket. My grandma was right next to me picking. It was a hot summer day and we had on our beautiful hats that shield our face. I suddenly spoke up about how I was tired. " Grandma I'm tired we've been picking for hours. My legs hurt and my arms are sore. I want to go home and eat blueberries!!" She simply kept picking after awhile she answered me saying "Hard work comes with results. If we stop picking now and go home to eat all the blueberries there will be nothing left to show for our hard work when everyone gets home from the pond. But if we stay persistent and get through a few more rows then we will have blueberries to share. Do you understand?" I nodded with renewed energy and started to picked blueberries again. This time not eating all of them. And putting most of them in the basket. When we went back to the house everyone was so delighted with the blueberries. We turned them into jam and blueberry pies.

I woke up to the birds chirping. It was a good dream. But a sad ending of reality. I looked around and realized I was still on the roof. I slowly sat up and went back into my room. It was 4 am way too early to be up. Even though the early time I went to get a shower and ready for school. I took my razor into the shower and cut up my leg. It was cold enough that I didn't have to worry about shorts. After the shower I made sure it was bandaged nice and wouldn't come off during school. I went back to my room in my towel to pick out what to wear. I put on my school uniform and started walking to school. It was only six school didn't start for a while. But I headed out anyway.

When I made it to school I went into my locker with an hour till school started. I went to see if my reading teacher was there she was surprisingly. She helped me with my homework. When I was done with it I left. I still had almost 40 minutes till school officially started. I went to the unlocked art room and took out my painting. It was almost finished. I got out all my supplies and started. When the art teacher came in she was amazed to see me here. I just smiled at the end of class I put it away and went to reading.

I was finally getting help for my classes. I wasn't failing anymore. I was passing at least.