Thantophobia (noun): The phobia of losing someone you love.
Hyunjin~
We currently just moved into our new house. A bit larger than the last one; two floors, three bedrooms, three bathrooms, living room, laundry room, kitchen, dining room, and a backyard with a big pool.
"This place is so nice." Jennie jumped up in excitement as she plopped herself down onto our new bed.
"Let's unpack tomorrow, I'm tired." I laid down beside her.
"Okay. You'll be here all day, right?" She looked at me all cutely.
"Mmh, alright." I started to act all cute too and she cringed.
I can't stop thinking about her.
Not my wife.
But the other one.
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Jennie~
"Nayeon!" I squealed as she came in the door.
"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry I couldn't come to your wedding. Family issues." Nayeon sighed as we went over to sit on the couch. Today, she's helping Hyunjin and I unpack and decorate.
"It's fine, I'm glad that you could at least make it today. By the way, what happened to your family?" I opened up a large box and started to take out some living room decorations and such.
"My father's business isn't doing so well after the scandal... you know, with my mom and such? It's kind of hectic right now." She pouted.
"Who do you live with now?" I asked her, being a bit too curious.
"By myself. My mother went back to the states, and my dad... you know, I never really liked him. I prefer being alone- I have way more freedom."
"That's so true."
Nayeon was born and raised in America by her mother, while her dad ran a beauty company here. Her father divorced her mom when she was just in middle school. Nayeon moved to Korea when she was eight, after her mother went back here to help out. Her parents got back together a few years ago... but it's still just as bad a before. Maybe even a little worse.
I met her when we were in our first year of middle school, right after her parents just separated. I saw her sitting alone- restless, lonely and heartbroken. I felt pity, so I went and talked to her. Our friendship started then, but we drifted apart during high school, since she went back to America. University came and she's back, also taking up the same course as me.
"Nayeon?" Hyunjin came down from upstairs and greeted her. "How are you?"
"I'm fine. You? How was your guys' first night together?" She winked.
"It was nice." I started blushing like crazy.
"Can I be the godmother?" She teased, but Hyunjin took it way too seriously.
"No way," He looked at me in disgust. What was that all about? "I don't want one."
"Oh, you guys haven't talked about that yet? I'm sorry..." Nayeon felt horrible, so she just kept her head down.
"Hey, don't feel bad. Hyunjin here is just being a total dick. Of course he wants children..." I looked at him but he just shook his head.
"No. I. Don't. That's something we totally can not do. Understand?" He stood closer to me, but I backed off. I felt quite intimidated.
"Okay, okay- let's not fight! No babies. Prevention. Protection. We're all good!" Nayeon awkwardly laughed while trying to push Hyunjin away from me. She sensed that I was starting to feel a bit uncomfortable.
"I'll start unpacking upstairs. Sleep in the other room tonight." He muttered before storming up the stairs.
"What the hell? I'm sorry you had to witness that..." I rubbed my neck in frustration.
"It's fine, I totally understand. It's my fault too... I shouldn't have brought that topic up, I didn't know that it would trigger him. By the way, is he usually like this to you?"
"This isn't new. Whenever I bring up pregnancy, he gets really angry at me. I shouldn't have said those things earlier. It's not your fault, it's mine. But don't misunderstand him- he's really nice. It's just lately..."
"Lately?" She raised an eyebrow.
"We slept together after the wedding. He was so out of it. I could tell that he wasn't thinking properly... Hyunjin couldn't even look me in the eyes that night."
"What an asshole. Why did you even marry someone like him?" Nayeon crossed her arms and sat back, since she felt stressed too. I'm such a horrible friend.
"Don't stress yourself out. Let's just talk about something else-"
"No. You're not okay and we need to talk," she put my hand in hers and gave me a comforting smile. "What's going on? For real."
"I don't think he loves me anymore."
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I'm woke rn bc of Produce 48 Finale ashwjwb it's so early... I rlly hope ma girl Han Chowon makes it huhuh >_<
Song: 히피는 집시였다 — With Me (ft. OLNL)
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insomnia ⌮ hwang hyunjin
Fanfiction❝Are you tired of loving me?❞ I close my eyes and count the stars, but I still can't sleep. © DIORTYUN {Illegirl Sequel} Started: Aug 24, 2018 Completed: Nov 14, 2018 ____________________________ Stray Kids (스트레이 키즈) - Hwang Hyunjin Fan Fiction