how to fall in love - jercy

3 - just a touch

p.j.

my eyes flutter open. 3:32 a.m. the blue neon lights from the nearby club dimly illuminates the room. his face was so close to mine. suddenly i remember that he's a stranger, no matter how much i felt like a knew him then when i was on top of him.

he was sleeping so peacefully. i held my breath, afraid to wake him. i wanted to touch him, but i was paralyzed. you'd think i wouldn't be so scared to breathe next to a guy that i just had my dick in.

but he was right there and i wondered if he was real or if i had sex with a ghost.

i wanted to trace my fingers over his cheekbones and his jawline so i'd never forget the shape of his face. i wanted to run my thumb along the scar on his lips. i wanted so bad to just get a little closer to him and maybe hear his voice again.

but yet, i scooted back, recoiling from him. my heart's beating faster because it's terrifying how much i want him near me. i've never hooked up with someone and be so obsessed with them. i wondered what i was going to say to him the next morning. i wondered if i should say anything at all.

i could hear annabeth's testy voice in my ringing ears. "since when was percy jackson such a pussy?"

i'm fuckin terrified but i'm not a pussy. i let my tense shoulders relax and began to breathe normally again.

it's okay. breathe in, breathe out. it's okay to let yourself fall. and slowly i did.

my mind unwinded.

i got one last glimpse of him and closed my eyes.

i began to slowly,

ever so slowly,

fall asleep,

and then all at once, i was at peace.